2019

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Rohan M.'s picture
2019

Happy New Year!

What are some of your resolutions for this brand new year, and what would you like to see this year?

Oh, and just so that this post is relevant: If I recall correctly, the Rapture was supposed to happen in "Winter 2018", because of the perfectly-natural blood moon this year and the "moral decadence" caused by us godless heathens. Well, guess they were wrong! But then again, I've heard that they've postponed the End Times to 1/21/19- the next total lunar eclipse! Will we survive it?

A happy 2019 to all, and goatspeed!

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Tin-Man's picture
HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYBODY!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYBODY!!!

As for resolutions, I am making the same one I do every year. I resolve to make no New Year resolutions. Has worked out pretty good for the past several years now.... *chuckle*...

arakish's picture
May everyone enjoy the

May everyone enjoy the upcoming elliptical journey around our star.

As Tin-Man said, "I resolve to make no resolutions." Been working for me for the last 50+ years...

rmfr

Algebe's picture
Made several. Broke them all

Made several. Broke them all within about an hour of dawn on January 1.

It's no good making resolutions during a holiday.

Rohan M.'s picture
Same here. I never, repeat,

Same here. I never, repeat, NEVER stay true to my resolutions, so I won't even bother with them this year.

In fact, it is not at all uncommon for me to outright forget what 97% of the resolutions even are by June of the same year.

Diotrephes's picture
According to this the world

According to this the world will end in 103 years so don't buy any green bananas.

"Jewish prophecy: Will Nova KIC 9832227 in 2022 herald the arrival of the messiah?"
https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/technology/science/jewish-prophecy-will-n...

Rohan M.'s picture
Naw, NIBIRU WILL CRASH INTO

Naw, NIBIRU WILL CRASH INTO EARTH TODAY!!! Uranus collided with a large object in the past and became sideways, so therefore, IT WILL HAPPEN!!!!!!111!!1!1!!!1!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HVnpAYoT6h8

Cognostic's picture
Oh for fuck sake. Now I

Oh for fuck sake. Now I gotta go out and buy a clean pair of underwear.

SecularSonOfABiscuitEater's picture
Happy New Year guys. I didn't

Happy New Year guys. I didn't make any resolutions. I just want to be better than I was yesterday.

Bad Santa's picture
I'm all ahead of you guys on

I'm all ahead of you guys on this!

I didn't wait for New Year's, I made my resolutions right before the Christmas Eve, on my last day of work before the holidays.
I vowed that during this holiday I will eat and drink and have a good time as much as my liver and stomach can take. And I can proudly report that I kept my vows (to a slight detriment of my liver and stomach, and a slight pain in the ribs area from laughing too much). But I'm still here and kicking.

And that's what I call a strong WILL, I made a resolution to do something, and I did it!

Happy New Year !!

Fallen's picture
I made some pasta yesterday

I made some pasta yesterday and after serving up I noticed that the pasta formed an uncanny 1 1 / 1 1. Then I realized with shock that the end is nigh. We've only got until November people - repent!

I think the noodly appendage was reaching out to me from the other side for sure. I may be the prophesied and hotly anticipated pasta prophet. Why me, flying spaghetti monster? Why me? I don't even cook with a recipe...

Tin-Man's picture
@Fallen

@Fallen

Love your humor. You're cracking me up!... LOL

Rohan M.'s picture
Ramen! May we all be touched

Ramen! May we all be touched by His Noodly Appendage.

BarfingJesus's picture
Ahaha, this is perfect.

Ahaha, this is perfect.
Ramen.

Cognostic's picture
Oh THANK GOD! I was having

Oh THANK GOD! I was having spaghetti-0's the this morning and was just bending over to kiss my ass goodbye when I saw your post out of the corner of my eye.

Fallen's picture
LOL

LOL

Is it coincidence that you saw my post just in time? I think not. The noodly appendage wiggles in mysterious ways. :)

arakish's picture
@ Fallen: Love the new avatar

@ Fallen: Love the new avatar. It is so cute, meant in a good way. Perfect picture for "Desert Fox."

rmfr

Fallen's picture
It reminds me of the Namibian

It reminds me of the Namibian desert where I grew up. Wish I was back there...

David Killens's picture
When the pasta speaks, listen

When the pasta speaks, listen or you will be pasta over.

Rohan M.'s picture
LOL

LOL

Nyarlathotep's picture
My resolution is not to make

My resolution is not to make any resolutions. Does that mean I automatically failed?

arakish's picture
@ Nyar

@ Nyar

Not in the least. By making no resolutions, you cannot break them. Automatic Success.

rmfr

Rohan M.'s picture
Yep. That itself is a

Yep. That itself is a resolution, so you failed, Nyar. Sorry.

BarfingJesus's picture
Happy belated new year, all.

Happy belated new year, all.

Just joined out of desperation for solace from the city of churches (get me the fuck out of here), loving the humor so far. It's nice to meet you.

Rohan M.'s picture
Welcome to ARep, BJ! Feel

Welcome to ARep, BJ! Feel free to join our family.

Goatspeed!

Tin-Man's picture
@Barfing Jesus

@Barfing Jesus

Dude, outstanding name! You should fit in quite nicely here. Welcome aboard. Can't promise much peace and quiet in this joint, but there is usually a good supply of popcorn and spiked eggnog to make up for it... *chuckle*... Hope you brought your arm floaties. Jump on in! The water's fine!

Rohan M.'s picture
@Tin Man but be careful, BJ.

@Tin Man but be careful, BJ. Arakish filled the pool, which means that it's at a temperature of some 15,000 degrees Celsius- which, as just about any (Orthodox or Conservative) Jew, any Christian, or any Muslim will tell you, what's in store for us once we're dead... :)

Tin-Man's picture
@Rohan

@Rohan

Arakish is just thinking ahead. He's trying to help us all get acclimated so that first plunge later on won't be such a bad shock.

BarfingJesus's picture
(sorry to revive the thread,

(sorry to revive the thread, whoops)
@Rohan M. @Tin-Man
Well crap, I'm late as hell. Sorry about that, I went into hibernation.

Thanks for the welcoming words, guys. Got quite a few good chuckles so far.
And thanks as far as the name, I appreciate it. In short, I've had Jesus shoved down my throat so much, I got Jesus coming out of my ears, my nose, and I'm Barfing Jesus at this point (I'll see myself out...). Nice to meet you.

I'll need those floaties too, thanks, I suck at swimming. Think I've mastered sinking like a rock though.

Also I, uh, heard they have good food in the cafeteria in hell, so it's not so bad. Every Tuesday there's a make your own pizza bar, plus there's no dress code. Sounds good to me. Better than having a glowstick over my head and wearing my grandma's curtains.

See you guys around, take care.

arakish's picture
@ BarfingJesus

@ BarfingJesus

Oh hell yeah, the food is good, but Tin-man's eggnog is better. Bathroom is last door on the left. Do not enter if there is a banana peel on the knob. Long story. Kitchen is first door on the right. The indoor pool is a chilly 14,998°C. But should still be within a theist's limits for what is in store for us.

And, of course, I loved that Screen Name first time I saw it.

rmfr

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