Death after becoming an atheist

8 posts / 0 new
Last post
Sunniva's picture
Death after becoming an atheist

So I'm new here and I have questions. I became an atheist just recently and I've been feeling afraid of death.

My brother just died and I don't know how to cope with it, now that I can't comfort myself by thinking there is a better place, because there is no better place and apparently no worce place eather.

Does anybody have any good advice for me?
Thank you

Subscription Note: 

Choosing to subscribe to this topic will automatically register you for email notifications for comments and updates on this thread.

Email notifications will be sent out daily by default unless specified otherwise on your account which you can edit by going to your userpage here and clicking on the subscriptions tab.

CyberLN's picture
Moving to Atheist Hub.

Moving to Atheist Hub.

Old man shouts at clouds's picture
Hi Sunniva,

Hi Sunniva,
Sorry for your loss;
when my brother died my family and I were devastated.Some sought the comfort of religion. Me? I tried to remember all the joy we shared together, I cared for his beautiful daughters that I still cherish. The happy times we had as kids and the times he beat up on me or I dobbed him in to my parents for sneaking out. In short he aint dead if you remember him.
Oh sure, the meatsack has gone, the physical presence is no longer but his "spirit" lives on with those who remember him. After 45 years I still lift a glass on my bro's birthday, to all the memories we shared, the the love and bond we had.

Hope it can work for you.

Tin-Man's picture
Hey there, Sunniva. Welcome

Hey there, Sunniva. Welcome to the site. Sorry for your loss.

I lost my Mom earlier last year. Losing a loved one is never easy, and everybody has different ways of coping. My Mom had numerous health problems and she was in almost constant pain for the last several years of her life. When she died, I was comforted by the thought she was no longer in pain. Do I miss her? Certainly. But as long as I have her memory with me, she will never fully be gone. Just like Old Man said, as long as you have your memories of your brother, he will always be with you.

And I know this is easier said than done, but try not to worry about death so much. As I have said many times before over the years, "Nobody gets out of this game alive. Might as well have fun while you can." Death is simply a natural part of Life. No way to avoid it, so why waste time worrying about it. Spend that time enjoying the Life you have now. Keep your brother's memory close to your heart, and honor him by living your life to its fullest potential. Hope this helps.

chimp3's picture
Seems to me a life that was a

Seems to me a life that was a unique event in time is very special.

Sapporo's picture
I don't know with certainty

I don't know with certainty that I will no longer exist after death, but I do know that in every moment I have consciousness, I must live true to my values and enjoy life.

Cognostic's picture
Fear of death appears to be

Fear of death appears to be natural to our species and I distinguish it from the "Fight or Flight" response present in all life.

It is the being who sees a rustling of the bushes and thinks "Tiger" who survives. If you think "wind" and you are wrong, you become lunch. So evolution has made us natural fear-mongers. We see the rustling of the unknown and think "Tiger."

I have another thread where I have posted where atheism has led me and my thinking. I titled it "I am the universe." This is actually how I find comfort in atheism and in my own death.

You have already died a hundred times in your "life." This is because you are not your life. You are a process of life. You are not the same person you were when you were born. That person is gone. You are not the same person you were when you were 5 years old. That person is gone. You are not the same person you were when you were 10, 15, or 20. They have all died to the past. They are gone and will never return. You are a process moving with the universe and a part of the universe. You are connected to everything around you and a part of all that is. Your atoms came from the stars. The physics that explain the universe also explain you. Your chemical composition is the same as the chemical composition of the universe. You are it and it is you. This "death" we speak of is just a part of the process. Like the flame of a fire, we exist and burn until the fuel runs out. Our atoms return to whence they came.

A drop of water separated from the ocean is still a part of the water cycle. In fact it is the water cycle in action. It is doing exactly what it is supposed to do as its part of the water cycle. It is never lost, never isolated, never actually separated. It is fulfilling the process of the water cycle. Very much like the water cycle, I see life as fulfilling the process of all that is the universe. We came from the universe and we return to the universe. Being conscious or unconscious really does not matter in the big picture as we are a part of all that is. So, to me, both life and death are simply a part of the process. I fear pain but not death. I fear losing my mind in old age, but not the act of dying. I am a strong supporter of euthanasia believing in the choice to die painlessly and with dignity. But, I see no reason at all to fear the process of life and death.

Just my take on it.

ZeffD's picture
Do lies and superstition

Do lies and superstition provide comfort or are fears best allayed by rational thought? How does it depend on the individual?

I think it is natural to awake or feel overwhelmed by fears at certain stages of life. Physiologically, these are apparently generated in the amygdala and it takes analysis in the frontal cortex to allay them.

Personally, I have occasionally experienced fear on wakening in the morning, but I know that "I" (my frontal cortex) has not had time to address the fears and I will feel differently when it has.

Donating = Loving

Heart Icon

Bringing you atheist articles and building active godless communities takes hundreds of hours and resources each month. If you find any joy or stimulation at Atheist Republic, please consider becoming a Supporting Member with a recurring monthly donation of your choosing, between a cup of tea and a good dinner.

Or make a one-time donation in any amount.