Homosexuality or Atheism, what's harder to come out as?

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Justin Frank's picture
Homosexuality or Atheism, what's harder to come out as?

Not trying to to place equal discrimination on either ways, but I feel my question is relevant. Personally I am an atheist from a large, right wing, bible thumping, christian family. Their views on both subjects are pretty much similar, both terrible sins. Myself and my wife tend to have arguments with my family about our stance on homosexuality but it's been tough for us to come out as atheist. What are your thoughts?

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hermitdoc's picture
I’m not gay (not that there’s

I’m not gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that), so I certainly can’t comment on what it is like to come out as such. I am an atheist who is still, unfortunately still in the closet to some degree. I am open with family and some friends, but because of my profession, I still don’t feel comfortable coming out in my work life, so I know what it is to be both out and in at the same time from an atheist standpoint.
In my opinion, I think it probably fairly equally difficult to come out for both gays and atheists. It takes tremendous courage to take that step. The difference though is how difficult it is to remain in the closet. In that regard, I would think it would be much harder to be gay. I say that because atheism is a passive stance. We simply don’t believe in any gods. We don’t actively assert anything other than the absence of belief. I think it would be much more difficult to hide one’s sexuality, as that is an active, major part of a human being’s existence. As an analogy, imagine being in the closet in regard to having blue eyes. If you have blue eyes, you have to wear sunglasses, colored contacts or whatever….If your eyes are some other color, you simply live your life. There is nothing to cover up. Atheists, by virtue of lack of belief simply have to live their lives without belief; gay folks have to cover up their sexuality.
That being said, it certainly is not easy being quiet about my atheism. When those around me are making stupid decisions based on their religion it takes effort to not to say something and it sometimes feels wrong, but for me, it comes down to simple risk/benefit and at this point in my life, I have elected to stay in the closet at work.

Suzanne Rust's picture
For me, I imagine that coming

For me, I imagine that coming out as gay would be more difficult for me personally. The vast majority of people who know me already know that I'm an atheist and it's never been an issue with them at all. I have Christian friends but they don't try to convert me or to change my mind when it comes to not believing in god or any deity. My parents are atheist anyway so they were not surprised when I admitted that I didn't believe to them. I'm old enough that I don't care any more if others judge me for being an atheist, that is their problem and not mine.

Jeff Vella Leone's picture
Obviously coming out as gay

Obviously coming out as gay is harder for the simple fact it is related to not just what you think but your nature.

Apart from the fight you have to do with everything around you, you also have to fight yourself to first accept who you are.

I am not gay but I can only imagine how hard it is to to fight against all odds even yourself.

I do something similar all the time, with my thoughts and counter thoughts and it is exhausting sometimes to try and prove my own thoughts wrong to myself.

Imagining that done on your own feelings, blows my mind.

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