Hi, my mother just asked me to go to church with her for this reason, which needs some explanation maybe:
Normally we don't have a preacher but sermons are read to the congregation.
Most of these are from 20-50 years back, so they are absolutely outdated in what they preach for or against.
Today they have a preacher, which seems to be better than normal in my mothers eyes.
Then she goes on about how we can only be happy if we get to know god and I should really go with them.
So I have declined by saying no thanks and that its not true that we can only be happy if we get to know god.
What do you think of that and should I go just to make my mother happy (even though it will make me really uncomfortable to be in church listening to all the bullshit that is spouted from the pullpit like a river of toxic mud) or does anyone have a way for me to really make clear to my mother that I'm not interested in going there (but in an nice way maybe, if this makes sense, sorry, I seem to be a bit rambling)
~Bart
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As long as it won't have any major negative impacts on your life, seems like a slam / dunk...do what YOU want.
I agree with CyberLN. I personally go to church to socialize, network for jobs and get taught a secularized moral doctrine.
Well,, it does not impact my life negatively, but since I still live with my parents it means that I cannot do certain things, most of them are not that important to me, so yeah, I do what I want.
I would not be able to socialize in my church, its not that kind of church, its a very conservative doom&gloom one with no room for joy.
those suck. I say don't go
I think some more explanation is needed on my part:
I do not feel welcome in this particular church, it is called (in dutch) Gereformeerde Gemeenten in Nederland, which translates to (google translate) Refromed churches in The Netherlands. Its way on the heavy conservative scale on protestant christianity and as a gay male I would be told there that I cannot do anything with (not anything about, but anything with) my sexuality, which equals to living alone for the rest of my life. Maybe that explains a bit why I don't feel welcome in such a church.
Another thing is that I perceive the people in the church there (and rightfully so, from multiple experiences) as extremely judgmental and gossipy. I mean: the whole town will know If a female shows up without a hat or headgarment of such sorts and the town will also know who dodn't come to church in "dark clothing".
The dark clothing (according to my mother, who apparently is "saved") is a sign of acknowledging that you are sinful/evil/anything that is bad. Yet the people who are among the "holiest" are also the most hypocritical.
In addition, I have had a "religious experience" If you can call it that, but I think I'll start a different topic for that, because its a long story.
cheers.
~Bart
If it makes you uncomfortable listening to the sermons and being surrounded by the people there, then don't go. Your mom will just have to suck it up. No disrespect here but I know the struggle. You just can't please someone all the time, not even your mom. At some point, they're going to have to respect your decision. You can do it without being rude, too. You do not need to sacrifice your personal freedom and happiness by forcing yourself to do something you do not want to do.