Another annoying christian neighbor thread....

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BAACKJD's picture
Another annoying christian neighbor thread....

So my soon to be ex wife and I are waiting for our divorce to finalize and I was fortunate enough to be bludgeoned into a conversation with my old neighbor (we'll call him Dick) while picking my son up at my old house. Dick was obviously ecstatic to be the guy to tell me that there's been a gentleman stopping at my wifes place the last few days. I told Dick that I can't really say shit because I've been seeing other people as well. (Side note: Don't ever start this conversation with someone in the process of a divorce. You're not helping.)

That's when it started. I hadn't realized it was time to go to church. He went on to tell me that he's a christian (he's repeatedly made this abundantly clear to me in the past) and that until we're actually divorced that we're committing adultery. I told him I wasn't certain what the paperwork requirements were during the bronze age when for a couple to be considered no longer married, but I imagine I've met similar requirements by this point. I let him know I don't really need or want his guidance. He responded by telling me that what he's doing is no different than how I've"thrown my atheism in his face in the past."

Here's the funny thing. The only statement I've ever made about my beliefs or lack there of is the following, and it only happened once. Here it is:

"I'm an atheist."

Yup that's it. This is something I've noticed a lot with evangelicals. In order to justify a blitzkrieg of preachin', they'll claim a false equivalence. If you've made any kind of statement that they feel contradicts what they believe, they call it an attack so they can hit you back you over the top countermeasures.

I need to move to the the forest and live in the trees. Who's with me?

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Jared Alesi's picture
Nah. You'll piss off the

Nah. You'll piss off the weirdos who believe in "the spark of nature". Still, hermitage might not be a bad choice if it annoys you that much. You could be like Emily Dickinson, just with less arbitrary capitalization of words.

Jared Alesi's picture
On a more related note,

On a more related note, however, I have had many encounters like that. My cousins' grandfather, whom I simply call grandpa, is a very devout Baptist. He tells me all the time about how militant atheists are and how much it bugs him, and how oppressed Christians are. The only atheist he's ever met is me, and he doesn't even know I'm an atheist. Yeah, so militant and oppressive.

Catee's picture
A.C. Grayling is one of my

A.C. Grayling is one of my favorite speakers. You can find him on You tube if you're interested.

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BAACKJD's picture
"how oppressed Christians are

"how oppressed Christians are"

Actual laugh out loud.

LogicFTW's picture
Same, I laughed.

Same, I laughed.

They call us militant, when they spawn things like the Westboro Baptist Church. (Plus, all of their history of killing and conquering in the name of their religion.)

SecularSonOfABiscuitEater's picture
"Dick was obviously ecstatic

"Dick was obviously ecstatic to be the guy to tell me that there's been a gentleman stopping at my wifes place the last few days."

Reading that, I literally said "what a dick!"....
And at that moment I had everyones attention in the office.

Sidenote: I'm down for a community in the trees.

mykcob4's picture
I live near Dallas. The

I live near Dallas. The screams and whining by christians are loud and clear. You actually don't have to do anything to have them on you. The mere fact that you don't participate in their shit is enough to get a host of people that set out to save you. It's like this site. Just the fact that it exists seems to be an attack on christianity to them. It doesn't matter that they can't even say which christian sect that is being oppressed by a bunch of people that want nothing more than to commune with free thinkers.
I just finished a conversation with my neighbor. She started the talk. She said she knows that "I am one of them. And I said, "what are you talking about?" She said, "You know, you don't believe christ is your savior." I said smugly "Nor yours" with a smirk on my face. She said, "Well, the governor will soon fix that." She was referring to Greg Abbott who has decided that he will force his evangelical agenda into state law. I said I voted for Wendy Davis. She said she knows all about Wendy Davis. I said, "Really, how so?"
She replied, "I'm pro-life!" As if that is all that there is about Wendy Davis. Davis is pro-choice. She basically told me in this conversation that she is a single issue uninformed voter, and that her vote is completely based on her religious idealism. Later she told me she is for the empowerment of women. I mean what a fucking hypocrite.

LogicFTW's picture
Wow. That is insanity.

Wow. That is insanity.

You guys face so much more of this than I do.

Last time I visited Las Vegas I was "saved" along with a couple dozen other random strangers on the street corner while we waited for the pedestrian cross signal. I thought it was pretty humorous, I thanked the guy, told him my conscious is now clear and now I am free to go sin some more!

Sky Pilot's picture
JB God's Country,

JB God's Country,

I've been there before. Just remember, Adam was a happy bachelor who had it all before he met Eve. After that he lost it all. Since you have a son it's hard to shake the ex-wife but have a divorce party and bury the relationship. It will go a long way in reducing your stress levels.

algebe's picture
@JB God's Country "He went on

@JB God's Country "He went on to tell me that he's a christian"

Even if he hadn't told you, you could have guessed it from his snoopy, sneaky behavior and judgmental attitude.

Anyway, tell him to take a long walk off a short pier. I hope it all turns out ok for you.

jamiebgood1's picture
Jb Gods country

Jb Gods country
That drives me crazy. In reality, christians have many affairs and yet ask for forgiveness because of what Jesus did. All good then. Also there are more straight christian woman who enjoy sodomy yet condemn homosexuals for doing the act.
This is kinda TMI but I assumed this man following me on twitter was John the Christian and wanted to ask his oppinion only antiracist song. This man was a liberal Christian that seemed moral enough. well after he was really kind and slightly helpful it turned sexual. He was looking for some woman who could do the things his wife would never do. He just hasn't found the right woman who could keep that secret. Well for 2 reasons I continued the conversation for a few days. 1. My own morality: Now that I'm atheist and I a godless Asshole who would hurt my family? To my surprise I found out the answer is No:)
2. How could this man praise god and try to set up a section with me at the same time. I stared college as a psychology major and loved school for the first time when I was 17 so this interested me. I left school because my best friend needed a roommate in San Francisco and I really didn't care about my education. It wasn't about eternity. So this man interested me not because I was attracted to him, a fact that gave me more confidence in myself when I could abstain from the idea. He preached to me over and over how holy one went down to hell so we are forgiven so we can set this up:) I know this is a lot of personal shit but as a girl who grew up in the church this is not uncommon. HYPOCRITES!

jamiebgood1's picture
Jb Gods country

Jb Gods country
Just to clarify My story was not to say you shouldn't be exploring other woman. You situation seems it'd be a good idea for you to play the field for awhile. My story was just to show hypocrisy of your asshole neighbor and his pals.

BAACKJD's picture
"Just to clarify My story was

"Just to clarify My story was not to say you shouldn't be exploring other woman. You situation seems it'd be a good idea for you to play the field for awhile. My story was just to show hypocrisy of your asshole neighbor and his pals."

I'm with you. That's a pretty blatant show of hypocrisy on this guys part. Usually the christian fellas will try to bury their desires under a few more layers of denial.

This neighbor is also racist as hell. He's one of those dudes who starts a lot of statements with the phrase "I'm not racist but....". Then again, I suppose the bible doesn't exactly go out of it's way to extinguish racism so perhaps he's justified?

jamiebgood1's picture
As a side note, and I'm not

As a side note, and I'm not trying to start a whole conversation about it. Young girls christians and not are choosing to have anal sex as a way to save their virinity. Somehow some boys are convincing them this is ok and I think girls are buying it. In my day, intercorse was off limits but oral sex wasn't losing your virginity. I thought you should know this JB Gods country because you have a 13 year old girl. My girl is 8 and I'm not looking forward to that conversation. From many different sources and the horses mouth there was a video taken of a young local Christian Wealthy high school girl having sex with older boy on the steps on campus. He had told his friends to hide in the bushes and video tape. Everyone saw the film and this boy was expelled and she was suspended. My clients 14 year old girls took an uber at 2 in the morning to boys house then back to their slumber party before ma woke up. my client only discovered this because of the Instagram photo her 14 year old girl posted of her snuggling with the boys. Don't hate me for these crazy stories please. I just know we need to educate our girls before they are put in these situations. maybe give them mace too:)

BAACKJD's picture
And I think a lot of this

And I think a lot of this falls in line with the non theist perspective on parenting as well. Teaching our children to think for themselves is crucial. That's something we've discussed at length here on the forum.

As a parent I hope I'm arming my kids with the fortitude to disagree with someone who's trying to con them into anything. So whether it's my son intervening when a bunch of perverts are having sex with the unconscious girl at a party, or my daughter not giving in to some little prick in the nightmare scenario you've outlined, they'll hopefully have that ability to speak up.

And yes, we're well stocked in pepper spray. The stuff I buy has reportedly made men shit their pants.

jamiebgood1's picture
Lol:). Jb God's country. I

Lol:). Jb God's country. I love that. I hope to teach my kids the same. In my case I have a 3 year old boy that is a little pisser most of the time. He's cute as hell but he can be a bitch. I got to treat him to respect woman because he's been a challenge. my daughter is peaceful chill like me.

Endri Guri's picture
Yeah, that's a Religious

Yeah, that's a Religious person's way to counteract the pressure of actually ANSWERING, especially Christians. I wouldn't bother with this person, while at every point, you do realize that he is still repeating the same thing.

mykcob4's picture
For JB's neighbor. If some

For JB's neighbor. If some asshole came up to me and said my wife was having an affair, I would say "I know, I saw her while I was fucking your wife."

jamiebgood1's picture
Thats AWESOME Mykcob4 LOL

Thats AWESOME Mykcob4 LOL

BAACKJD's picture
Update:

Update:

Let me just start by saying that I know this is going to sound like bullshit, but I swear to science that that it's the honest truth. This neighbor got arrested this week for sexually assaulting his 16 year old niece. This is the christian who was lecturing me on adultery.

algebe's picture
It's always the pious ones!

It's always the pious ones! Watch out that he doesn't try to blame it on the satanic influence of the neighborhood atheist.

Jared Alesi's picture
"I swear to science" lol I

"I swear to science" lol I love that

Pitar's picture
I'm pretty easy with the

I'm pretty easy with the whole christian superiority thing. If ever the occasion presents, go to a born again congregation and listen to the inbreeding going on there. It's a marvelous entertainment and it costs no more than the dish you make and bring. They go on and on and on about finding god, and get all resolute about being lost and then found. If any of your friends or acquaintances are BACs and invite you to a retreat, suck it up and accept. Fun stuff.

LogicFTW's picture
Hehe. I done such a good job

Hehe. I done such a good job avoiding the highly religious that I never get invited to those sort of things. Living in a major metro area really helps an atheist run undetected, I would say at least half my neighbors barely ever go to church or do not go at all.

There is a mega church near me (attendance of over 10,000 every weekend) They set up their sermons like rock concerts with light effects, lasers, fog machines and new age music etc

I been tempted to go, but I always assumed they would play creed on repeat or something.

The anarchist in me wants to, (very carefully,) have a few small chunks of dry ice hidden in my long sleeve shirt, walk into a church with those holy water fonts, or stoups vessels, near the entrance to the church and covertly drop a few small chunks of dry ice into the water, and yell out "holy shit" while I have another friend covertly film the church congregation response while I make a very hasty run for the exit.

LogicFTW's picture
Woah.

Woah.

There is a psychological term for that, when people lecture others the wrong, at almost every chance they get, but in turn the wrong is something they secretly do themselves. Bugs me I can not pull up the term in my head right now.

I will have to admit, it does seem a rather unlikely chain of events, you talking about the guy on these boards, and a week later the guy is arrested. I will take your word for it, no real harm in doing so we are all mostly anonymous here.

That poor girl though :(

Sexualy unwanted acts occur frighteningly too often on kids, and more should be done about it.

At least, in an increasingly camera surveilled world, more of these heinous people are getting caught, and these creeps get thrown to the wolves in prison.

BAACKJD's picture
I should reiterate he's only

I should reiterate he's only been arrested, not found guilty. I don't imagine he's even been officially charged yet. I suppose it would have been prudent to wait to tell this story until their's an actual outcome, anonymous or not.

CyberLN's picture
Odds are he will not see any

Odds are he will not see any jail, let alone prison time.

jamiebgood1's picture
Typical Christian type I've

Typical Christian type I've known.
So Sorry for his niece :( Castration for pedifiles. That's mean but fuck em

LogicFTW's picture
Not mean enough imo.

Not mean enough imo.

Sky Pilot's picture
JamieB,

JamieB,

Pedophilia was a normal legal activity in America as recently as the late 1890s. The age of consent was 7 in Delaware in 1895. Other countries started raising their age of consent laws and it spilled over into America so it wasn't long before everyone got on board and started raising the age of consent across the board. In the Jewish Babylonian Talmud the age of consent was three years and a day. Think about all of the guys swapping their three year-old kids with each other.

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