An Atheist walks into a church....

36 posts / 0 new
Last post
Tin-Man's picture
@Cog Re: Glowing red eyes

@Cog Re: Glowing red eyes

So happy that you noticed my new glowing red eyes! *clap-clap-clap* Got them for Christmas! The coolest part is that I can change the colors and have different strobe effects.

Sushisnake's picture
@Cog and Tin-man Re: Tin-man

@Cog and Tin-man Re: Tin-man's glowing red eyes.

"The coolest part is that I can change the colors and have different strobe effects. I use one to burn ants on sidewalks"

An Atheist walks into a church and sees a 10 foot golden Jesus on a cross looking down on him. He realizes the church is full and everyone in the congregation is singing "Onward Christian Soldiers." He notices the congregation are all wearing masks. When they reach the final chorus, they rip off their masks and all are revealed to have cloth ears and painted on eyes.

( Sorry for the thread detour earlier, Cog)

Tin-Man's picture
@Sushi Re: Burning ants

@Sushi Re: Burning ants

Unfortunately, everybody refused to get me the laser-eye option for the kit. (I have no idea why. *shoulder shrug*) Anyway, I admit I was a little bummed about it, because that leaves me with still having to use my magnifying glass attachment to burn the ants. Cloudy days are really boring now.

Tin-Man's picture
An Atheist walks into a

An Atheist walks into a church and sees a 10 foot golden Jesus on a cross looking down on him. He realizes the church is full and everyone in the congregation is singing "Onward Christian Soldiers."

He politely walks up to the preacher and asks, "Could you please direct me to your bathroom? I really need to take a holy shit."

Flamenca's picture
How cool the Twilight endings

How cool the Twilight endings!

Since anyone doesn't know already what the heck we're talking about anymore, I feel like remembering those countries where the atheist of this tale couldn't speak, at risk of the death penalty (my country is a paradise to atheists by comparison):

1. Afghanistan
2. Iran
3. Malaysia
4. The Maldives
5. Mauritania
6. Nigeria
7. Pakistan
8. Qatar
9. Saudi Arabia
10. Somalia
11. Sudan
12. The United Arab Emirates
13. Yemen

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/the-13-countries-where-being-an-...

Attachments

Attach Image/Video?: 

No

Pages

Donating = Loving

Heart Icon

Bringing you atheist articles and building active godless communities takes hundreds of hours and resources each month. If you find any joy or stimulation at Atheist Republic, please consider becoming a Supporting Member with a recurring monthly donation of your choosing, between a cup of tea and a good dinner.

Or make a one-time donation in any amount.