Telling my mom

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Jake_God’s_Fake's picture
Telling my mom

Hey everyone! I have been Atheist for a little while now, but I have not told my mom. My dad knows and accepts me for it. He isn’t religious so we agree on many non-religious views. But my doesn’t know. I would like some advice on how to tell her that I am a strong Atheist. Any advice helps! Thanks!

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Tin-Man's picture
Hey there, Jacob. Welcome to

Hey there, Jacob. Welcome to the AR. Great seeing you have been able to slip the grasp of religion at such an early age. Gives me hope for our future... *chuckle*... Be that as it may, I have a quick question for you... Why do feel such a strong need to tell your Mom about your being an atheist? Granted, it is totally your choice in the matter (obviously). But if she never asks or brings up the subject, why make potential trouble for yourself if it isn't necessary? (Especially if you believe it will cause her excessive stress and/or emotional pain.) Also, your profile shows you to be 14 years old. Therefore, I'm guessing you still live in her home and are dependent on her and your Dad. I do not know your Mom, of course, but your telling her could potentially cause the household environment to take on awkward/uncomfortable living conditions for you. However, only you can make that judgement call. And if you just REALLY feel that you HAVE TO tell her for some reason, then I would at least wait a few years (if possible) until you are out on your own and self-supportive. Just my two cents worth.

On the plus side, at least you seem to have your Dad on your side. Many people in your situation are not that fortunate. Just a bit of FYI for you, though... If your Mom and Dad have a healthy and solid relationship, then they likely do not keep things from each other, especially when it comes to their children. With that being said, there is a strong possibility your Mom will know about your views long before you get a chance to tell her. Like I said, though, I do not know your parents, so that is just speculation on my part. I would suggest speaking with your Dad about it since he is cool with your choice.

Anyway, that is all I have for now. Been slow in here the last couple of days, but stick around and there will be others come along with advice of their own. We have some good folks here. Good having you with us.

LogicFTW's picture
Hey Jacob Trappett,

Hey Jacob Trappett,

First I would recommend to not use your full name (if that is your full name) on the internet where possible. Use a favorite character of yours from a book or show that you identify strongly with instead, or just about anything other than your full name. You state you are 14, so I think this is particularly true that you should take steps to protect your identity from the millions of strangers on the net, of which it is possible a few might mean you harm. Although I would like to think you are safe to do so here on atheist hub.

Anyhow...

I am going to guess that your mom is fairly religious, or you would of already had this discussion with her.

First realize, it is highly unlikely you will be able to change her mind about her stance on god.

But there is good news: you state your dad is not very religious, and they they still make it work. I am sure your mom is aware your dad is not very religious. (I am assuming your parents are still together.)

This seems to indicate your mom is okay with this at least when it comes to someone as important to her as your dad. This is a good sign your mom will be accepting of you being atheist. You did not leave us with very much information (and that is fine!) But based on what little you told us, I think you should be just fine to discuss this with your mother.

If your mother does happen to start getting very upset when talking to her about this, I recommend backing off. It can wait until you are 18 and out of the house. No need to stir up a giant fight when you do not have very many options to leave.

 
 

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Rohan M.'s picture
@LFTWUse a favorite character

@LFTW

Use a favorite character of yours from a book or show that you identify strongly with

A reference to Tin-Man? :)

Rohan M.'s picture
Hello, there! Welcome to our

Hello, there! Welcome to our family!

See this WikiHow:
https://www.google.com/amp/s/m.wikihow.com/Tell-Your-Parents-You-Are-an-...

Hope it helps. Goatspeed.

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