As an atheist parent, I know how to talk to my kids about other peoples beliefs. I am letting my kids decide for themselves. I even allowed my son to attend a week long bible camp with our old neighbors. The father was a Baptist youth pastor. Heck, we even went to the ridiculous closing ceremony and sat through the songs about how "we dont need a rocket ship because we have God". Then when we left and i realized the whole astronomy theme for the week was their way of keeping the kids interested so they could try to debunk Science i had major damage control to do! Luckily my son loves Science and adtronomy and now that he's 11 he doesnt believe in the existence of a God. Ok, sorry Im rambling.
My real issue right now is with my 6 year old daughter. Her best friend at school comes from a devout Catholic family who attend church at least once a week. Her friend spent the night and at dinner i overheard her say to my daughter that Jesus would know if she lied and she wouldn't go to Heaven. My daughter said that that's not true. I told her friend that it isn't true and that I dont believe in Jesus. She of course was shocked and looked at me like i was crazy and i quickly changed the subject. How do we deal with believers children? I wouldn't want her parents pushing their beliefs on my child and we all know how what their reaction would be if i had delved deeper into the subject. I managed to avert the discussion this time but what about next time? My daughter has told me that she believes in Jesus since. I know this is the influence from her friend. I know her friend is instilling the fearof Heaven and Hell into her. Frankly Im surprised that her parents still allow her to be friends with my daughter. My son has lost friends and has friends that arent allowed to come to our house because we are non believers. How do we deal with this? My son told me he hates Christians. I told him that he should not hate them or even their beliefs. He asked, why not? I told him that the world doesnt need more hate. Its ok to not like people because they are not good people but we cannot group them all together as they do us.
ughter.
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I am from a Muslim background. recently figured out the fiction of religion and have turned agnostic.
Currently i am living in England and i often think what am i going to teach my children.
I dont know how it will go. but i believe if I stay in England and in a city like london they will eventually find there way given enough space and support (i will see as it comes).
But ofcourse it wont be easy i know that for sure. I think if you have a non religious environment at home you can tell your children why people need a belief. that is why there are so many religions ( a proof everyone believe what they want to believe or not believe)
and how religion is a strong reason of division that is why we do not need to be associated to one or even hate those who do.
I hope it makes sense.......
It agitates me when people tell my daughter you should go to church, you should do this or that. My wife insisted on bringing our child up with a religion(Catholic) By the same token, I tell my daughter that it is okay NOT to believe, and NOT TO GO TO CHURCH. She is 13 now, and has done her time in church, going to religion classes, communion, confirmation...all of that. But now, she choses not to go to church as often, and wouldn't go anymore if not for my wife taking her on holidays, and is glad all this nonsense is finished. I make my feeling known that it is okay for her not to want to go anymore...it dosen't make her a bad person, or does it make her a lesser person than anyone else. ( I am in the "mecca" of Catholicism here...just about every kid follows the same regimine) She has asked me many times in the past why don't I GO TO CHURCH...AND MY REPLY WAS THAT i DON'T BELIEVE IN THOSE THINGS, AND that there are many people who don't. There is also other religions, that you may choose to embrace later on in your life if you choose to do so. Catholic is not the only religion. There are MANY other religions with their own beliefs, and their own Gods that they worship. And it is okay to change your mind, and make a different choice if you desire. There is nothing wrong with that, and you are still the caring, loving person you were 5 minutes ago. But most importantly, you do not need a religion to be a good person. I w anted her to see and realize that there is another side to this thing...a side that she otherwise would not have heard.
@aber. You make perfect sense to me and have obviously put much thought into the larger picture of this world's suffering under the burden of religion.
All I can advise, or suggest, is to dispense with overt resistance or combativeness because it simply does not matter. It will not serve you or your family well if you conscript them to public denouncement of belief systems. We were also children once and were exposed to similar indoctrination. We thought our way out of it and usually in homes where doctrine was alive and well. Give your children the same credit for rational thought.
What I would do is ask them what kind of religious exposure they've had and explain to them that there are two distinct views about doctrine from believers and non-believers in that some people see it as a truth and some know it as a story only, respectively speaking. Be sure to let them know the definition of doctrine and why belief systems have no basis in fact. Plant the seeds of doubt but don't insist they take up your fight against it. They need to make that leap on their own. Your job is to act like a referee.
And, relax a little. In a free society religious zealotry doesn't stand a chance against the free thinkers at large.
Thank you everyone for your input and you have all made valid points and i have learned some things. I feel though, I may have rambled to much so my question wasn't very clear.
When a child from a believer family is telling your child about God and Jesus and is doing it right there in front of you. How do we handle that situation? I feel a certain respect for their family to not just blurt out "God isn't real". Get my meaning? Maybe i should just ask her to not talk about that with her? I mean she is trying to instill the fear of God into my daughter unknowingly. They're 6!
I made sure to adequately prepare my son for such nonsense before he entered school, so I haven't really had to worry about it. He knows what indoctrination is, knows that other children are victims of it. He himself told me not long ago that it was weird, because he could go without ever discussing his beliefs, yet these kids could not seem to go a single day without whinging about theirs. I told him it was because their "faith" replaces their identity, that they are told constantly that they are evil pieces of crap and only Christianity gives them any value, to which he asked how their parents could get away with that. All I could say is that it was a good question.
I'm trying to do the same thing, so they understand what is going on.
It is so frustrating that the religious are producing another generation of brainwashed religion-zombies. I hope the information society will be a great help in spreading knowledge and helping people to wake up.
I think the most important thing to do is to teach your child to think critically, and to teach them that people don't always tell the truth. I wouldn't worry about a 6 year old believing because 6 year olds believe a lot of silly things. It doesn't mean she is going to grow up into a fundamentalist. But this is a great time to start teaching her about critical thinking skills. If I were you, I would get the book "Maybe Yes, Maybe No" by Dan Barker and read it with her. It is a fun way to show kids that just because someone says something is true doesn't mean it is, and it shows them how to find out for themselves what is true and what isn't.
If she learns skills like this and applies them, even if she grows up and is a christian, you can rest easy at least knowing she came to her belief through thinking about it properly rather than just believing what she was told.
Hi, Keri. We try to avoid these subjects in company. If someone does blurt something out, I don't respond immediately, because I realize that I am not going to change anyones mind...but I'll wait for an appropriate moment to explain to my child that there is another side to these things, and it should be your personal choice as you get older what to believe or not to believe, or what religion, if any, you choose. But I tell her, to always go with what makes sense, and what is logical, THAT , hopefully, is how they will figure this out. It is eventually up to the person which direction they will go on this.
My kids are in their 30s and 40s...all without any gods. Looking back, I don't remember saying anything to counter a religious person's ramblings to them other than that I disagreed with them. Gawds were simply a non-thing in our home. One or two of them went to temple or church with a friend on occasion but that was more about being with a friend or curiosity.
Your 6 year old says she believes in jesus. Bet she believes in Santa and the tooth fairy too. She'll grow out of it.
Your kids spend the majority of their time with you and take their cues from you. I'm not sure you have to do anything active to counter this other than saying you disagree with the notion of any gawds and why.