I was raised a Christian. As I child, I was instructed to confess my sins and ask God for forgiveness; taught that the Bible was divine; and was expected to preach the gospel to my peers. Although my parents took the appropriate steps to indoctrinate me, they failed to do so.
When I was fourteen I heard on Fox News that Christians were being persecuted because of their faith. Naturally, I wanted to defend my religion against any hellbound atheists. However, reading, annotating, and researching the Bible led me to a very different conclusion that I expected it to. I determined it was rife with absurdities, bigotry, contradictions, cruelty, and historical as well as scientific inaccuracies. I realized my pastor was unwilling to address certain topics, such as genocide, sexism, and slavery, which are sanctioned in the Bible . Several weeks passed and after further researching history, philosophy, religion, and science I concluded that our universe had no need for a god.
I remember reading books about the supernatural claims in Christianity at a relatively young age. It was always blatantly obvious to me that those accounts shouldn't be taken literally. I was distraught when learning a significant number Christians thought genesis was a literal account of the origins of the cosmos. By that age I had already been introduced to evolution. The evidence was and remains to be undeniable.
As much as I wanted to reveal the truth to my parents, I understood the seriousness of the situation. I intended to keep my atheism a secret from the age of fourteen until I was at least eighteen and financially stable.
However, my mom began noticing the books I was reading and the scientists I began idolizing. I'm sixteen and three days ago I when was driving home from dance my mom began lecturing me about the alterior motives of scientists. She argued that scientists create evidence then present it as fact in order to further their political agenda. I'm working to become an astrophysicist, so I took immediate offense to her outrageous claims. By the time we arrived home she said, "Belle, you don't understand. There are people in this country that would love to demolish religion. I feel like the books you're reading are taking you down that path." I didn't say anything. She then asked, "well, are you an atheist?" Knowing she'd find out sooner than later, I confessed. I've never seen her cry so much.
After a long discussion we decided not tell any other family members, including my dad. She, ironically, criticizes my beliefs, whereas I'm not allowed to criticize her's. Hopefully, she'll become more accepting of me in the future.
Subscription Note:
Choosing to subscribe to this topic will automatically register you for email notifications for comments and updates on this thread.
Email notifications will be sent out daily by default unless specified otherwise on your account which you can edit by going to your userpage here and clicking on the subscriptions tab.
well you have to live your own life not the life of your parents.we should respect the beliefs of others,as long as no physical harm is done.
A fast learner! Good luck!
you did a wise thing to educate yourself with books, your mother should respect your views.your not physically harming anyone it is only a certain belief pattern.in this day and age we have the freedom to read different material then what our parents read.they should be open to new ideas.when i was growing up in a single parent household in the 50`s my mother always gave me room to think fairly and when i went to high school much like you, she didn`t go to mass and neither did i.it was optional, i learned from biology class that the sciences did explain alot of things.i respect and thank the scientist for medical technology, and so on, both religion and science play a part in our development.
"When I was fourteen I heard on Fox News that Christians were being persecuted because of their faith. Naturally, I wanted to defend my religion against any hellbound atheists. However, reading, annotating, and researching the Bible led me to a very different conclusion that I expected it to. I determined it was rife with absurdities, bigotry, contradictions, cruelty, and historical as well as scientific inaccuracies. I realized my pastor was unwilling to address certain topics, such as genocide, sexism, and slavery, which are sanctioned in the Bible . Several weeks passed and after further researching history, philosophy, religion, and science I concluded that our universe had no need for a god."
Genocide, sexism, and slavery? As if, genocide isn't sanctioned, neither is sexism, in fact Ancient Israel was far better than anyone else at the time or even recently. Slavery is banned in the Torah, indentured servitude is something different entirely.
"As much as I wanted to reveal the truth to my parents, I understood the seriousness of the situation. I intended to keep my atheism a secret from the age of fourteen until I was at least eighteen and financially stable.
However, my mom began noticing the books I was reading and the scientists I began idolizing. I'm sixteen and three days ago I when was driving home from dance my mom began lecturing me about the alterior motives of scientists. She argued that scientists create evidence then present it as fact in order to further their political agenda. I'm working to become an astrophysicist, so I took immediate offense to her outrageous claims. By the time we arrived home she said, "Belle, you don't understand. There are people in this country that would love to demolish religion. I feel like the books you're reading are taking you down that path." I didn't say anything. She then asked, "well, are you an atheist?" Knowing she'd find out sooner than later, I confessed. I've never seen her cry so much."
Oh yeah, deja vu, I didn't want to tell my parents that I was a Jew, but my mom found out anyway, I don't think she really cares though she may disagree. My dad is the Zealot though, so if I told him that, I imagined it would turn out like that satire play from the daily show when a Mexican man's daughter says she is voting for trump,
Me - "Hey dad, guess what? I don't believe in Jesus anymore!"
Dad - (Russian accent) "Oh, son, you break my heart, now, I go into a coma..." (beeping noise)
Yeah, not a good plan.
Hello BelleMarie:
One thing that's very clear from your post is that your mother loves you very much. Be gentle and give her a little time to understand. It was a big step for you to become an atheist. It'll be an even bigger step for her to understand because she's been involved in religion much longer.
Congratulations on the freedom you've won through your personal courage, and congratulations on your choice of a career in science. I'm sure you know that scientists don't create evidence. They find it and use it to increase our knowledge and improve our lives. Science made the polio shots that you had when you were little. Science finds the oil reserves that are used to put fuel in our cars. The benefits of science are all around us everyday.
Just be aware that you haven't done anything wrong, and that you're not the first teenager to disagree with her parents.
Great for you sweetheart! I, too, am young, but at least my parents aren't hardcore religious, so there wasn't crying, etc.. I feel for you, sister.
You've taken a big step, and I welcome you to this new non-religious world! Just try to be yourself, and someone will accept you for that courage. :)
@ BelleMarie
I agree very much with what Algebe wrote.
It's good that your mother is so thoughtful that she thinks it's best to not tell the rest of the family.
Be aware that many believers have a skewed view of what atheism is (even many atheists seem to have misconceptions about atheism), so it's possible that she could feel unnecessarily hurt by having an incorrect image of what it means that you are an atheist. For example: Some theists think that an atheist is morally "lost".
Speaking for myself, as an atheist I lack belief in a god because there simply is no supporting evidence for it. If supporting evidence were to show up, I would start to believe in proportion to that evidence.
My guess is that the worst part for your mother is her belief in life after death, and that you would not be a part of that. Finding a diplomatic answer for that could perhaps ease the pain.
Bellemarie,
My mother told me she would pray for me to find god. I told her that she must know it's a con because she has to leave me out in the cold and she said "yep" very softly. Surprised, I said, "that's fine, leave me out in the cold, just don't act like you know something that I don't".
She's never brought the subject up again. Something will appeal to your mother's ability to reason, you just have to find it.