My best friend just lost her grandmother today. What complicates things is that she and her family are Christian, and I don't know how to comfort her. Anything that could be said to comfort me in the same situation would just be insulting to her. I can't tell her that her grandmother's in a better place, or that they'll see each other again. Lying won't help anyone, and neither will telling her anything I believe personally. Any advice would be appreciated.
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Just say you're sorry for their loss and you're there if they need anything. The last thing on their mind is judging how eloquent and accurate your condolences are.
Thanks. I've assured her of this already. I guess I was hoping that there was something I could say or do that would just magically make things better. I know it's not that easy. Nothing ever is.
@Jared
Dealing with the death of someone close to you is never easy. Trying to comfort a friend who has lost a loved one can often be even more difficult. My Mom died earlier this year, and for many years prior to her death she suffered from many various medical conditions. Chief among them were severe arthritis and fibromyalgia which kept her in almost constant pain and made simple daily activities difficult. My Mom was very religious and had a deep rooted faith in God, Jesus, and the promise of heaven. Naturally, many other friends and family made the familiar comments of my Mom being in a better place now. Oddly enough, I was easily able to agree with them, but not exactly in the way they may have meant it. I loved my Mom dearly, and I was very sad when she passed away. However, at times it was very difficult to see her struggle so bravely to cope with the pain that constantly wracked her body. Yes, there are certainly moments when I wish I had her back, but at least I do have the peace of mind in knowing she is no longer suffering as she did for so many years. So, in that respect, she is in a better place.
By the way, John6IX, wonderful words of advice.
The best thing you could do is just be there for your friend Jared, death does come the beginning of life we learn to face the cringe of death. Just be supportive don`t mention or discuss god or jesus unless they want to, and then be gentle This is a sobering time in there life so choose your words. Don`t espouse hatred of god or contradictions in your friends belief system .just try not to get into the god thing right now If you come off as anti god you just may incite more grief. be patient and very careful here jared.
Offer a friendly ear and get her to talk about her loved one.
I am sorry for your loss comes right to mind. You don't need to complicate things with god talk
Jared Alesi,
Give a lot of cash.
Sorry for you and your friends’ loss. Just be there for them. You don’t need to say anything.
Jarad Alesi---I don't really think your asking for advise. The psychologists and counselors in this forum would give you al the clichés you all ready know. I am sure if you read back their advise their answers would be mostly the same. They will say what you already know. DO THE RIGHT THING....No one can tell you what you already know