So, I have a question that I would like to pose to the group, but it is rather off-topic.
However, the thought process is one that is related to morals, (the topic du jour on AR's Facebook page). Such as, I am hopeful you folks might be up for some rational discourse on the subject.
I firmly believe that "morality," as a human construct, is a hybridization of empathy and bigotry. True "morality" can only be defined in terms of empathy. For example, I do not wish to be murdered, therefore I not only do not myself commit the crime, but because I abhor death, I abhor murder. Similar logic I apply to theft, infidelity (although this is a mixed bag of thought that depends upon whether or not we are truly evolutionarily monogamous...) and the like. Things like homosexuality, premarital sex, masturbation, pornography, etc... as a question of morality I believe to be human constructs, that are taught in many cases indirectly by society - a social construct.
This brings me to my question. I know of a child that is by society's definition transgendered. The child, an 8 year old that has been exhibiting cross-gender behaviors since he was about 4, and has expressed that he wishes he were a girl, and claims he was "born wrong."
I am forced to consider, by extension of my thoughts on morality, a child that is transgender is not really transgender in a genuinely gender confused way.
If the only core true definition of gender is that (with the exception of genuine hormonal differences which do not appear until after puberty) each sex possesses different genitalia, and that the gender "roles" that society has constructed over millennia are social constructs - illusions of "proper and improper," then how do we define transgender?
In other words, if a child/youth that is labeled as transgender expresses a desire to be a member of the opposite sex, where does this desire come from?
If we raised children without any concept of gender, and any child were free to select the "trappings" of their day, i.e. toys, clothes, hair length, manner of play, etc... how would we define transgender? Would such a thing even be a "thing?"
I want to be excruciatingly clear here that my question is genuine. This is not "trolling" nor in any way shape or form some sort of logic trap that is going to end up either invoking Godwin's Law, or coming off as bigotry. I'm honestly looking for the thoughts of people who do not subscribe to nor are (as much as possible) influenced by religious teaching, and thus more open minded.
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Okay, I'll bite.
I, too, have posted a topic here that has zero replies, so out of "empathy" I will reply to yours with my honest opinion. Who knows, maybe karma is real after all.
I am a male. I was born a male and always have been. I have always been attracted to women... sexually. I am attracted to men, however, in a much more emotional way. As a young child I was much different than the other boys in my small town community, and far from what my "redneck" father wanted me to be. I was flamboyant, loved to cook and play with craft supplies, and hated being dirty or having things placed out of an orderly fashion. I even liked to dress up, do my mom's hair, and put on make-up. In short, I was mentally acting like a woman (or at least how society portrays women and their typical gender roles).
I had no idea that what I was experiencing was considered abnormal by many until my parents started asking me if I was gay right about the time puberty started to take its course. I just thought that being "girly" was normal. It was, after all, much more fun than sports or hunting. As time went on and I made it through the tougher teenage years, I started to hunt with my father and play sports in high school. I started to adapt to the small town mindset that I was being forced to accept, but I never lost touch with my creative, flamboyant side.
Today, I find myself only aroused sexually by women. I would much prefer, however, to spend all of my time with a man. I am emotionally attracted to men, which might sound weird, but is totally clear in my mind. I've had far more crushes on men than women, mostly because of their personality and humor and never because of their physical beauty. I never once wanted to be a woman. Looking back on my life, however, I feel like I might have been born into the wrong gender. This was evident in my early years growing up, but couldn't be totally defined until I was much older.
I guess what I'm saying is that you can't be sure... yet. I had a similar problem, but wasn't aware of what could be done or how to express my feelings. Maybe, when the child is older, he will renounce all previous feelings, or even forget them altogether. I went through a lot of phases before figuring out how I felt, and I'm still not sure I have a name for it. It takes time, and an 8-year-old does not have he experience to make such a decision (at least in my opinion).
Thank you,
RubiksAndRum