my religious freedom!

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Harry33Truman's picture
my religious freedom!

This morning, Mabel came to me, and she said:
"Harry- you shall circumcise all of your female children in the flesh of their clitorises- as a sign between you and me, for I am the Mabel your Cat!"
And I said "YES Mabel!" But then I realised that apparently it us illegal to circumcise girls- but the Jews are allowed to circumcise their boys, and their religion is bullshit!
This just blatant Anti-Mabelitemitism!

Don't they know cutting outmy daughters citorisis part of my religion? Why are they giving preference to certain cults over others?

Its just a little snip- a useless piece of meat, its easier to clean too, and this Muslim doctor told me it was totally harmless! He ven released a bogus study claiming that slicing off highly errogenous tissue doesn't effect sexual pleasure to prove it!

Why can't I cut my daughters clitoris?

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LogicFTW's picture
Hah, nice! This Mabel cat is

Hah, nice! This Mabel cat is cunning!

I wonder how this fictional muslim doctor went about his fictional test to prove extra tissue does not affect sexual pleasure.

"Hi lady, I need to conduct a test, for my fictional study, for my fictional religion. I assure you this is a scientific test, I need lots of women to test this. I will need a control group and a genitally mutilated group, the more the better, I need to prove my hypothesis in my fictional test to support my fictional religion. It needs to be as close to the normal thing as possible to prevent other polluting factors skewing the results. Please drop your pants mam."

Then the woman dropkicks this crack pot, and puts this guy on a sexual predator list or just tosses the guy in an insane asylum.

Reminds me of a comic I read:
"Oh you are talking to an invisible man with supposed superpowers no one can detect? To the insane asylum for you!"
--Later to a group of 20 people--
"Oh you guys are all talking to an invisible man with supposed superpowers no one can detect? Hold everything! I need to protect your rights to do this, and oh, here is a nice fat tax break while you rake in millions of dollars getting other people to believe this invisible man!"

Harry33Truman's picture
What do you think of MGM then

What do you think of MGM then?

Sky Pilot's picture
FGM was very popular in

FGM was very popular in America for well over a century. It just became illegal in America in 1996. The insurance companies paid for the operations. "clitorectomies of minors were covered by Blue Cross-Blue Shield until 1977." Female genital mutilation (FGM)
http://www.whale.to/a/female_genital_mutilation_h.html. It was advertised in popular magazines. If you know older women chances are at least one of them knew a woman who had the operation. Right now it's most popular in Egypt, Ethiopia, and Indonesia but it's common in over 30 countries. It's actually more of an Egyptian cultural habit than a muslim one. Some muslim sects are against it even though some crazy muslim clerics advocate it.

Mufti shocks Russia with call for genital mutilation of all women
http://www.arabnews.com/node/971581/world

US doctor charged with genital mutilation on girls
http://www.arabnews.com/node/1084361/world

https://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2011/01/17/female-circumcision-end...

peaceful parenting: History of Female Circumcision in the United States
http://www.drmomma.org/2009/09/history-of-female-circumcision-in.html

Harry33Truman's picture
Exactly!

Exactly!

LogicFTW's picture
I apologize I must of missed

I apologize I must of missed something, I cannot figure what the MGM acronym is. The only MGM acronym I am aware of is: Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Studios Inc is an American media company, involved primarily in the production and distribution of feature films and television programs.

And that makes no sense in this context.
I admit I am still fairly new to these boards and some of the atheism theism concepts as discussed on these boards.

Nyarlathotep's picture
I got no clue either.

I got no clue either.

Harry33Truman's picture
Male Genital Mutilation

Male Genital Mutilation

Pitar's picture
To each his own. Priests flog

To each his own. Priests flog themselves bloody to kill sexual desire and maintain their vows of celibacy.

One native islander kid I knew on some far flung island paradise whacked off his weezer in a drunken rage with his machete and threw it into the lagoon he stood on the shore of screaming "It get me in trouble!!" Had to fly his dumbass off the island to get stitched up because we had no medical facilities.

POWs are routinely mutilated in the groin just out of SOP because it hurts the most there. Makes folks talk real quick. Geneva Convention says Just Say No to torture but the reality is torture is a requisite treatment if the greater good (information) it gleans saves additional loss of life.

Some island nations practice clitoectomy to prevent the female population from making sexual overtures on the male population when birth control is essential to survival. Yep, two matching shells from a bi-valve are sharpened and snip-o-rama, the deed is done.

And, what about tattoos? Tell me that is not a form of self mutilation and I'll call you selectively naive.

The whole of the collective religious ceremony and body-damaging (ectomies, warts, tattoos, body shaping, insertions) acts eludes my sense of WTF.

Harry33Truman's picture
How will myckob respond?

How will myckob respond?

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