well, first of all, to me ı have been always in between when it comes to make a decision whether should I abandon my religion or not? l come from a Muslim family and culture, so as a result we all have been dictated to believe in what we are told and taught actually. but l began to criticize Islam step by step and l have come to a point that ı cannot go beyond. there are two kinds of opinions in my mind which pull me back into my religious view and pushes me forward to leave Islam simultaneously.

l must admit that when ı looked at the Quran which l read throughout my life and sayings of prophet also I often see that there are some events or issues which seem incompatible with my mindset. for example, ın the quran chapter 18 verse 74, one of the guys with whom Moses was taking a expedition kills innocent child and says in response to Moses' outrage that l killed this innocent child because according to information that l take from Allah, this child would grow up and become an apostate and torture his parents. when l see this verse l thought that there must be a legitimate reason behind this action.Yet ı understand now that how come god allows a person or so called prophet to slaughter innocent child for the sake of not being an infidel and cruel when he grew up. indeed, god himself allows someone to have a child and then take this child back but whats interesting that god already knows this would be able to happen.