Hey everyone. It's me, duh.
Everyone in my house is unemployed now and trying to get on benefits. Whole state is shut down . I'm keeping my shit together best in the house, keeping things clean and organized and trying to keep everyone's spirits up but guys, I'm fufking hurting
I know we all are. I know everyone is going through this shit , but I'm just so exhausted and tired and stressed the fuck out, and not only am I dealing with real world stress but it's causing me to back slide on The Issue. Had my first relapse in like a month today, that heat on my chest and anxiety and terror as out of nowhere I was obsessed again with the story of Lourdes apparitions and just why her story would be constructed as it was of she was delusional or lying. If she was making up the story why didn't she say from the beginning that she was seeing Mary? If she was delusional why did her visions stop? I'm pissed at my anxiety for thinking this is important right now, I'm pissed that I don't have the energy to focus on what is real and important right now and I'm so tired
Subscription Note:
Choosing to subscribe to this topic will automatically register you for email notifications for comments and updates on this thread.
Email notifications will be sent out daily by default unless specified otherwise on your account which you can edit by going to your userpage here and clicking on the subscriptions tab.
Dear Mikheal
Stop it. Here is something to think about. My partner is VHR ( Very High Risk) and because of that we are both locked down in our home, going stir crazy.
How do we cope? I play poker online, I play other games online and I restore toys vintage toys. We clean, we garden our 17 metres of garden where I grow fruit, herbs and vegies all in pots.
We keep busy, we look at our trees and plants and breathe deep. At no point do either of need or think about any of the fantastical beings that obsess you.
Why? because we long ago put such thoughts away for the useless fucking waste of time that they are. You have come along way Michael.
Man up.
Someone needs you NOW to help. You are young, fit and in relatively no danger from the virus. Volunteer and do something for your fellow man or woman or trans person, whatever.
Stop stressing, obsessing and, in these plague times stop the fuck being so fucking selfish. DO SOMETHING TO HELP the vulnerable in your community.
People is dumb.
Expecting a lunatic to act rationally; kind of makes you look like a lunatic.
Mikhael - what OMS says. Trust me, we all have problems... fuck them.
Focus on “today”, “this morning” ... when your mind slips, get your wife to snap you out. For instance, if you’re in the kitchen, and you feel the record start, tell her. She can ground you by asking you some questions like “what color is this cup?” “ what do you smell” “what does this feel like?” (Both of you need to do this fast). You may not have been diagnosed but it sounds a lot like OCD, and there are ways to manage symptoms.
Sleep is verrrryyyy important - make sure you are getting it.
@Whitefire
"Sleep is verrrryyyy important - make sure you are getting it."
Of which I've just been reminded, because didn't get to sleep last night.It's currently 0609, and I'm awake and cranky as well well as Cranky. Will have another bash later this morning. May read something soporific on my tablet . EG posts by any of the apologists here. Always thought they might come in handy some day.
@Mikhael
If there EVER was a time for Lourdes "miracle" waters to heal people. NOW would be it.
And surprise surprise, its shut down. BY THE CHURCH, that fully controls the 50+ acre grounds.
If the church felt the fountain had any real measurable healing power, they would be funneling people in, picking up converts by the thousands. But they are not, instead they are telling people to stay away.
Draw whatever conclusions from that you want. But I can not think of even one scenario that bodes well for the various unproven, unevidenced, untested miracles of Lourdes. And a ton of conclusions that heaps on that the loudres stuff is all pure unevidenced bull shit.
I was so giddy when I read they shut Lourdes down man. It's just a nail in the coffin
Right now my issue is still the same fact that I feel a need to account for and explain everything. I feel I have to map out the thoughts and motivations of a girl 170 years ago I never met to explain how everything could have played out and that's obsessive and just exhausting
Hey everyone. I had a long talk with my wife today. I haven't been wanting to dump my stuff on her too much because she's taking the current crisis harder than I am, and I didn't want to add to it. It helped to unload, like it helps here or on my other groups. It's a flare up, not the end.
I hope everyone is staying safe. I feel sort of selfish coming here and asking for support on something like this when there's real shit going on, but I appreciate you all. Try to stay healthy.
I actually like some of the sense of normalcy in these boards. Well except for the increased activity, but I like that :)
Wish I had more time to post here. Playing host to several family members (of which some are deeply religious,) as well as putting in lots of hours a week at work. (I work in cyber security and that activity has NOT slowed down.)