Blasphemy competition

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algebe's picture
Blasphemy competition

Who can utter the foulest, most offensive blasphemy. Who can burn the paint of heaven's gates and send god's eyebrows flying?

Hail Mary, screwed by god.

Our farter, who farts in heaven.
Hollow is thy name.

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Aposteriori unum's picture
Fuck your god. Yahweh is a

Fuck your god. Yahweh is a fictional stupid son of a bitch. Jesus is a gay hippy mythical character with a genocidal retard father who can't write a decent book about dicks if his asshole depended on it.

I tried, Algebe. Maybe something better will come later.

Old man shouts at clouds's picture
For the modern American

For the modern American evangelist: "Jesus was Jew"
For the priesthood " Molesting small boys is a crime"
For the Bishops to the Pope "Covering up wrongdoings and instigating pogroms is a crime against humanity and God"

Given their respective mindsets I think that's pretty much blasphemous for them...

Flamenca's picture
Our Dictator, Who was

The Our Dictator prayer.

Our Dictator, Who was invented,
War is Your Name,
Enlightenment will come,
You will be done,
on Earth as it was like a heaven.

We'll let us think for ourselves,
and realize there are no sins,
as we forgive those who are indoctrinated;
we'll lead ourselves, right into temptation,
who says that's evil? Ahem.

Cronus's picture
A mannequin is window

A mannequin is window dressing.

Jesus is cross dressing.

And not in a good way.

chimp3's picture
Jesus is on the cross and

Jesus is on the cross and crying out "Peter! Peter!"

Peter crosses through a gauntlet of centurions and throws himself at the foot of the cross. "Yes , my Lord?!"

Jesus replies : "Peter! I can see your house from up here!"

mykcob4's picture

What kind of dumbfuck do you have to be to believe a crackpot idea that is based on a book that is so ambiguous and childish it isn't even funny? What kind of fucking moron do you have to be to base your whole fucking life on such nonsense? What kind of insecure fucknut are you to involve your life with such a fairytale that you deny REASON and SANITY?
Just because the "bible" is old you believe it? Do you go to antique shops and kneel and obey whatever gravity is scribed on a piece of old furniture?
Well, I have a 100-year-old bar stool that has a plack that reads "Kiss my ass"!

MCDennis's picture
Why does anyone give a shit

Why does anyone give a shit about what a compilation of stories by bronze age sexist, racist, homicidal, genocidal peasants says??

Aposteriori unum's picture
Ooo a meme.


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