6 posts / 0 new
Last post
mykcob4's picture

Now I know that I am an old man, and my best times are behind me, but still, I don't understand the excitement of going to parties. It's Saturday night here in DFW. There are two things that are mainly going on.
1) There is a shit load of rednecks getting fucked up in bars or at parties.
2) Cops waiting for those assholes to cross a white line or two.
I work from home and I work between the hours of 4:30 PM until 4:30 AM. I work every day except for Friday and Sunday. It's just the nature of my business.
So needless to say I can't run with the party crowd, not that I'd want to. Let's examine what a basic party is.
Someone decides to have a party with or without a theme. People start coming over. It is expected to have plenty of food and lots of booze on hand. Usually there is music and usually, it's too loud.
So what do you do at this party? In my case, I talk to people about things that I just talked to them about a couple hours earlier. Not really exciting. If there is entertainment, that is a whole other story and depending on the act it can be quite fun. But still, you have to be patient and just observe whatever is shoved down your throat. So tonight I have been invited to 4 neighborhood parties....why I have no clue.
1) Is a Peruvian party. I'm not catholic, don't speak Spanish, and don't drink.
2) One is a redneck party and they want me there just to bad mouth Dems and praise Trump.
3) One is an Ismaili Pakistani party. The food will be great and the people highly educated, but at some point, I will either be the star (novelty) or just a complete outsider.
4) Is a Vet party, but since I don't like to actually talk about any of the firefights I have been in and memory lane is really not my bag, this is not an option.

With the exception of the rednecks, I like my neighbor's who invited me, but I can't think of a good reason to go. I'd have to shave (hate it), wear nice clothes (Like just wearing T-shirt and jeans) and drink a bunch of sodas while watching everyone else gradually succumbing to alcohol.

I even hate the word "party". I hate what it's become. In my day it actually meant getting high and or becoming irresponsible.

The Mormon neighbor is having a party. They use to invite me but finally got it when I went to one and never excepted another invitation for the past 5+ years. You should go to a Mormon party. It's scary, to say the least. The women are all Stepford Wives. The men are a bunch of wimps seeing who can apologize the most, and at one point they turn on the TV and all watch the Mormon channel. The food is okay and nobody drinks, not even a soda. You feel like you should have brought a loaf of white bread. a jar of mayonnaise, and your DNA history.
Well, I guess I'll walk over and at least say hi to everyone that invited me, and come back to work, but I don't want any PART of "Party".

Subscription Note: 

Choosing to subscribe to this topic will automatically register you for email notifications for comments and updates on this thread.

Email notifications will be sent out daily by default unless specified otherwise on your account which you can edit by going to your userpage here and clicking on the subscriptions tab.

ZeffD's picture
"In my day it actually meant

"In my day it actually meant getting high and or becoming irresponsible."
Technically, it is still your day. You aren't dead yet.

I never liked parties unless I generally knew everyone there. I've never been to a party where I knew almost nobody and I would never attended a place where someone got "high" illegally. I've been drunk and seen friends when they are drunk. From that I learned I didn't enjoy either one and we are funnier when sober, or nearly sober.

I like the idea of parties, but normally end up in the kitchen.

The worst thing about parties (and some pubs and nightclubs) is the music. It is usually too loud to talk over and I don't dance. So there is no point in my being there.

Parties are a good education. It is interesting how some people conflate noise and activity with action and enjoyment. I've witnessed some people who literally seem not to be able to enjoy themselves while sober. I prefer a good conversation with informed people who "bring something to the party" - ideally good humor and a joke I haven't heard before.

mykcob4's picture
I totally agree Zeff.

I totally agree Zeff.
I had a neighbor (who has moved thankfully) that spent every day in his garage, the door open, playing music way too loud, getting drunk. He literally drank himself to sleep every day. He thought party meant getting drunk, trying to have sex with every girl around, and playing music as loud as the dial would go. I would have to go down to his house, turn off his stereo and put him a headlock at least twice a week.
His life consisted of being too competitive.
He thought he was the best looking, toughest, smartest, most talented person that ever lived. He competed with everyone about everything. AND he was ultra-religious. He once posted on his Facebook page "Thank god for the Oklahoma Sooners, money, and pussy."
He would get drunk. Try to hit on any girl, and try and get into fights, every fucking day. I don't know how many times he was knocked out. I knocked him out at least a half-dozen times. Oh, and he would take any drug he could get his hands on.
Now get this. He had a 21-year-old son. The son and son's 19-year-old girlfriend moved in. The son didn't have a job, just sold pot once in a while. The 3 of them would get high and drunk in the garage every day. One day the dad started a fight with his son. The son beat the crap out of him and went to jail for domestic violence. While the son was in jail the 56-year-old dad married the 19-year-old girl. Is that fucked up or what?

Sheldon's picture
" While the son was in jail

" While the son was in jail the 56-year-old dad married the 19-year-old girl. Is that fucked up or what?"

Sounds like it was lifted straight out of the bible to me, ironic or what.

Nyarlathotep's picture
Naw, if that story was from

Naw, if that story was from the bible the bride would have been 10 years old; and the groom would have been 200 and already have 3 wives.

mykcob4's picture
So I'll continue about "party

So I'll continue about "party".
Today I have been invited to no less than 3 parties in my neighborhood. I will make an appearance at all 3 be it short ones.
Again the Mormons decided to try one more time....Borefest!
The Secret Service Agent that lives directly across from me is married to an Indonesian. That party will be full of Indonesian girls gossiping and a bunch of white guys(their husbands) standing around listening to Indonesian girl gossip in Indonesian.
The third party is an "Evangelical Episcopalian" party. Now those people know that I was raised Episcopalian High Mass. I have never even heard of Evangelical Episcopalian. I told them that I don't agree with their politics, or religion so I have no idea what there is to talk about, but I'll come by.
At least none of the parties will have drunks or drug addicts or sexual predators running around. Two of the parties won't even have alcohol.
Believe it or not, I WILL have to work on Thursday. the rest of the world doesn't celebrate Thanksgiving.

Donating = Loving

Heart Icon

Bringing you atheist articles and building active godless communities takes hundreds of hours and resources each month. If you find any joy or stimulation at Atheist Republic, please consider becoming a Supporting Member with a recurring monthly donation of your choosing, between a cup of tea and a good dinner.

Or make a one-time donation in any amount.