One Year Refugee... A Journey to Death or to Rebirth


It happens to me sometimes, that I’m looking at something but my eyes are blind somehow. It happened to me a week before I started writing this (let’s call it) article while driving my bike through the city of Freiburg when suddenly I lost control of the bike and fell on the road; I ended up with some wounds on my right elbow and hand. It also happened almost a year ago, exactly on the 9th of October, 2015, somewhere in the woods next to the Turkish city of Izmir at 6.30 p.m. when the inflated boat was in the water and I should’ve jumped in the boat before but I didn’t, and of course I ended up in there with another 39 people screaming Allahu Akbar (hoping that it’d work out) for the two-hour journey to Lesvos Island in Greece. I spent those two hours looking at everyone who were on the boat. At that moment I wanted to shout and tell them that I’m an atheist and that what they’re fearing now is the same thing I’ve feared for years, and that was when I realised that we’re all human beings with fear and willing to live. I was overwhelmed by that situation and promised myself that I’d do my best when I reach my destination to do whatever I can to help those people and myself.

It’s a big part of my religious maturity as a Middle Eastern, that I realised, at some point, that those people are so naively simple, that they’d be totally lost without a divine entity to cling onto or an ideology to control them.

Almost five months before starting that Journey I wrote an article called “Islaham”1 in which I criticised a considerable number of the middle eastern immigrants, and I ended up amongst hundreds of them five months after. … So here I am writing briefly about these few months of my experience with them!

Motherfucking European

What’s funny about many of the so called “Freethinkers” or “Seculars” in Syria is that each one of them stops being so modern and cool at a certain point, which differs from one cool guy to another; for example: now you can talk to many Syrians who are so secular that it hurts, but if you mentioned that Al Assad is a war criminal then they suddenly change to be something not that cool, and even if the word “Atheist” was written on your forehead that won’t stop them from calling you a “motherfucking Jihadi”. The same situation goes for feminism, sexual freedom, the opposition, the religious sects, etc.

Through many years I’ve been called “a motherfucking European” because to many Syrians, Europeans are filthy, honourless and vicious creatures, so I’ve been asked many times to get the hell out of Syria to Europe so I can be one of them because I refused the idea of beating my sister if she had sex outside marriage, or I disagreed with someone over a political topic in which I became a Zionist Illuminati but also a victim of the Western big conspiracy to destroy our beloved country, or, or, etc.

Irony is, that many of these people ended up putting their lives at risk and selling all of their possessions in their beloved country to reach the hating and vicious Europe.

Give it up for the German Counselor Mohammed Ahmad

Yes this can happen, Mohammed Ahmad is actually a symbol for many of the refugees I’ve dealt with, who curse and disrespect other refugees because they have what the firsts consider to be “low jobs”.

Amjad, an Iraqi man who’s almost 30 years old, is a refugee. He claims that he has two college bachelors’ degrees and he occupied a position in the Iraqi Parliament. A great example, huh? Let’s bring more of them.

Well, Amjad told me that he disrespects another Iraqi guy and finds him stupid because he found a job in a hotel in the village I used to live in. According to Amjad, the other guy is doing a “low job” while he can do nothing and get money anyway. When I told Amjad that it’s our duty to take the first job we’re offered to ease the burden on other Germans who from their tax money we’re getting ours, he said that they get much more money from the raging war in Iraq, oil money….

Khaled, a 22-year-old Syrian man, is a refugee. He studied Medicine for three years in Syria and decided to come to Germany to have the freedom of attacking Germans, other Islamic sects and other religions but Sunni Islam. I called him to wish him a good birthday and asked him how’s he doing with finding a flat. The answer was that he found one after months of searching but he refused it because, as he claimed, the flatmates were homeless-looking people (hippies) and people who are getting support money from the state. So for those who didn’t realise the situation, this guy who’s a refugee and taking support money from the state, refused to live with German people who are taking support money from the state.

Don’t cry, I’ll become a refugee

“Guten Tag Herr Achmad, can you please fill this paper?” A German social worker asks.

“No, fuck this shit. Send me back to Syria, Iraq,” Many refugees said.

I heard the last sentence more than ten times a day for the 25 days I worked as a translator in the Caritas and the infirmary in the camp I was in.2 Not to mention many other situations in different places and times through this year where I was asked to translate.

Dear sensitive and politically correct readers, I do understand these people and their hard situation, but it was the same for me, but that didn’t give me the feeling that Angela Merkel had called my father and asked him to send me to be a refugee. And being in a hard situation shouldn’t give the justification from numerous of these people to behave and act like this. These people have a better life and chances now. It’s not easy and they don’t have bribes and corruption in Germany as we have in Syria. You can’t just give the employee a 5€ bill and expect them to grant you asylum after the lunch break.

Germanic prosperous and victorious conquests, a gift to the World

There’s a big difference between the two worlds, the German and the Middle Eastern, and this is normal of course. But what’s not normal that there are many Germans who hate their past and what their grandparents did in the WWII. You can see all over the country monuments, sculptures and museums talking about the crimes of the Third Reich. The majority of the middle eastern Muslims, on the other hand, have always and are still longing for the terroristic and bloody Islamic history which started with the immigration of Mohammed [the prophet] from Mecca to Al Madinah, and didn’t end until this day….

Also, many of the refugees told me that they feel no gratitude towards Germany for having them as they’ve told me and that’s for many reasons:

1. Some of them believe that Germany is benefiting from the raging wars whether in Iraq or Syria by taking oil or selling weapons to the armed groups.

2. Many Muslims believe that Earth belongs to Allah and only to him, and since they’re the best nation produced to Mankind,3 that means that the Earth is for Muslims. Also, in Islam, for the Muslims who have a full knowledge about the Islamic fundamental teachings, they’re obliged to praise those teachings everywhere in the World.4

3. Others think that they’re brought here because Germany is desperate to have them for demographical, political and economical reasons.

La Fin

I felt like I would’ve suffered if I didn’t write what I’ve written here, but I still have much more to talk and write about. Another reason is that I just want to start another discussion about this topic instead of what we are witnessing nowadays. I have no hard feelings towards anyone or anything but I want to help with creating a safe environment where no one is ridiculed or disrespected while doing no harm in any aspect or context in order to aim for other problems that endanger our existence as a human race. Also, I think that it’s good to speak out about those experiences I’ve faced without any social or religious restrictions and not being afraid, unlike the past time when I was oppressed with no law to protect me, and with a high risk of being violated or killed anytime without any aftermath.

From where I see it, our societies and countries, and with it, our situation, won’t change for the better if the people don’t put themselves, their social system, traditions and religions in the place of discussion instead of blaming all of their problems on external factors and make enemies of anything that’s exotic from their traditional, cultural and religious comfort zones.

I want to talk more about the last sentence but I think it’s quite known now, the relation between Middle Easterners and the conspiracy theories, etc.

Lastly, I want to point out the fact that there are refugees who were already oppressed, violated, beaten and traumatised by the other refugees back in their home countries, and they have the fear that they’ll go through the same experience now in their refuge.5


3 Quran 3:110
4 Quran 3:104
5 Quran 9:123

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