A nice way to shut a Christian up?

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Lauren's picture
A nice way to shut a Christian up?

I usually don't put myself in many situations where I am shared the "good news of the Lord" by religious folk but today I just happened to be there. A man started speaking with me and just went on and on despite my fake smiles and consistent "uh-huh"s. I bit my lip as he spoke instead of being direct primarily because, again, I am not frequently in that situation. I don't want to come off as a closed-minded jerk but more so as a nice understanding person.

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Rob's picture
I always go for the jugular

I always go for the jugular and ask them "why does your god kill innocent children" and they always reply the same thing "because someone in their family did something bad and they are paying for it"........

Henry Plantagenet's picture
Or as Bob Ingersoll said, why

Or as Bob Ingersoll said, why is God telling me how I must raise my children, when he had to drown his?

RileyN7949's picture
Or you could ask "How did

Or you could ask "How did adam and eve talk when there was no language back then?".

James's picture
Oh that is a harsh one but

Oh that is a harsh one but perfect too. I find that to be one of their most pathetic excuses for something.

AnimalLeader's picture
I find it easier to just tell

I find it easier to just tell them I dont care to hear any of it. I heard it as a child for way too many years but it didnt work on me.

Walker's picture
I always make a very

I always make a very uninterested face and just nood. Then if they continue to bug me I just look at my lock and say I have to go.

DarkLight's picture
I wish they would just stop

I wish they would just stop trying to force their beliefs into society. Day by day they are losing followers and this is worrying them.

Lauren's picture
I think next time I will be

I think next time I will be very sincere in speaking about my personal experience of being religious and tell them that it is not of my interest to become involved again. Like I said, I do not want to sound snappy, closed minded and hateful (which is easy to do), but more-so as someone who understands from experience and knows the path I want to be on.

ImFree's picture
First and foremost, I think

First and foremost, I think one should be extra careful how one responds if this occurs in the workplace. If religion is sanctioned by management christians can and will endanger your job for not believing what they do.

James's picture
i read this on internet so i

i read this on internet so i use it ever since: "if you would have been born in India you would be a hindi, if you would have been born in Afghanistan you would be a muslim, if you would have been born in Israel you would be a jewish, if you would have been born in thailand you would be a budhist... so you are just a god away from being godless like me" while I smile sarcastically

Russell's Teapot's picture
*Hindu :P Hindi - is the

*Hindu :P Hindi - is the language and Hindu are the people of the religion! Not criticising, just correcting! So that when you say this to a theist he can't ignore your argument by pointing out the spelling error! :)

AnimalLeader's picture
Nice quote there James. I

Nice quote there James. I would love to hear what believers would say to that.

James's picture
most of them dont know how to

most of them dont know how to respond to it, but i also have recieved responses like: "oh is the same god and creator with different names so people from different countries relate to it"

Zaphod's picture
I wear my expressions on my

I wear my expressions on my sleeve and so when accosted by these people un-wantedly I engage in conversation with them but say little and they often get the idea pretty quick they are wasting their time with me. I do try to make every word I say count with them though and use it to help expand my knowledge about whatever group they belong to or get them to go away depending on my desire at that time. When they say things I find stupid or offensive I don't say word but let it be known through mainly facial expression how they are coming across this often results in them trying to reword what they said a few times and then me being invited to some event or the calling over of someone who who has more knowledge about the religion than they do. But if I am really in a hurry I say I don't have time right now and must be getting on with my day. If they continue to harass me I let them know they are harassing me using these exact words "Please stop harassing me." if they persist I say quite sternly "Stop harassing me!".. Out of the hundreds of times this has happened to me over the years I can say only a few times has it failed to stop them in NYC and once outside of NYC I like this approach because I don't actually have to tell them anything about how I disagree with their religious beliefs or pick apart their belief though sometime I am in the mood and have time to kill for this, but in the end they are the only ones who are being offensive which is something I would rather not be.

Mike Lammersdorf's picture
This happens to me all the

This happens to me all the time. I always like to engage in open minded discussion when it happens to me though. I like to ask deep rooted questions and see how creatively they challenge them. Almost always the response is a variation of ultimate faith in whatever they believe in. I do appreciate their efforts for conversion though, as it is an admirable trait to be persistent.

Mike Lammersdorf's picture
Sorry this doesn't really

Sorry this doesn't really answer the question. I suppose its just to give you more of an alternative. Maybe if they don't shut up you can give them a go for their money. ;D

lomfs24's picture
I usually use a quote from

I usually use a quote from Ricky Gervais. Here it is,...
"Since the beginning of recorded history, which is defined by the invention of writing by the Sumerians around 6,000 years ago, historians have cataloged over 3700 supernatural beings, of which 2870 can be considered deities.

"So next time someone tells me they believe in God, I’ll say “Oh which one? Zeus? Hades? Jupiter? Mars? Odin? Thor? Krishna? Vishnu? Ra?…” If they say “Just God. I only believe in the one God,” I’ll point out that they are nearly as atheistic as me. I don’t believe in 2,870 gods, and they don’t believe in 2,869."

Of course I post this is a question form. Seems to sink in a little better. Like I'll say... "Did you know there have been over 3700 supernatural beings recorded in human history in the past 6000 years? etc..."

Usually shuts them down pretty quickly. It won't make them change their mind but it does make them not want to talk to you.

Zaphod's picture
I like these responses!

I like these responses!

Russell's Teapot's picture
add to the 3700 the 330

add to the 3700 the 330 million different gods of Hinduism xD

Walker's picture
Best way to shut any relgious

Best way to shut any relgious person up is to ask for any solid evidence. The other day I was having a conversation with this guy who kept telling me "you have to believe in jesus, because god said jesus was his son"....I wanted to slap some sense into this poor guy but I had to be civil because he was being polite in his arguments. I just told him "ok, now give me proof that god said that" to which he replied "just read the bible and you'll see"..................................sigh...................it's like a 360 of relentless faith.

James's picture
honestly I have come to the

honestly I have come to the conclusion that sheeps will always be sheeps, does not matter how valid your arguement is.....

J.C. Johnson's picture
Im with Mike.. Although it

Im with Mike.. Although it doesn't necessarily answer the question, I always engage in a conversation that reflects my atheistic outlook. I like to bring up Pangea/ tectonic plates and why the Bible doesn't mention any of that.. Pangea seems like quite the event to have been disreguarded in a supposed 'accurate- chronological' series of events as to how the world was created. Now this of course going to trigger the Christian t quickly defend themselves by saying something about how the Bible was written and translated many times by several different people (which, ironically, only proves your point further, lol). Ultimatly, as long as you know your facts and have a strong foundation to your argument, the majority of Christians will start t become subtly ad slightly irritated that they will usually break off the conversation themselves.

J.C. Johnson's picture
*sorry for the typo's

*sorry for the typo's

Henry Plantagenet's picture
Are you sick and tired of

Quite recently I read the entire Bible straight through, all 1370 spine-tingling pages, from Genesis through to Revelation. I took copious notes as I went, pages and pages. One of the things I was watching out for, was the issue of GLBT and gay marriage, since opponents of gay marriage invoke the Bible so often. Here is some of what I learned:

•Opponents of gay marriage are basing their arguments on Biblical texts that are not only dubious but also contradictory; also the alleged ban on gay marriage comes from a Jewish legal code that nobody ever really followed, and in fact the Torah didn't even exist as a body of law until most of the history of the ancient Israelites was already over.
•The people who established Christianity decided openly that they never intended their followers to follow that Biblical code either.
•The sin of Sodom was not homosexuality.
•The first great king of the Jews was gay.
•The Bible does not support marriage between one man and one woman – the men of the Bible overwhelmingly deserted their wives, or committed polygamy. Genesis does say that God did pair one man with one woman, but only because God's first plan didn't work out -- one man and one animal. God's plan was actually...bestiality; it was Adam who held out until God gave up and gave him a woman.
•The Bible cannot possibly be relied on as a guide for morality anyhow.
•The Bible does not support the rest of today’s conservative agenda, either.
•The Bible can’t be trusted as a source at all, which invalidates Torah law and the use of the Bible as a source and justification. Among other things, even Jesus didn’t claim he was divine and he did not intend to die for our sins, which makes it impossible for anyone to invoke Christianity to defend moral or political views, or anything else.
•The people who built these religions – priests – purveyed a completely fabricated picture of the world, and took a number of other steps, with the single aim of controlling their flock of believers. The aim was control, not saving souls.

I posted this because just recently, the local Baptists -- hard-core gay haters, the real thing -- tried to recruit my daughters. They tried really hard -- they sent their pastor to our house and everything. My youngest lastest one hour in their church, and then calmly declared "religion is child abuse'", and went over to watch Spongebob; the Baptists screeched at her that she was gonig to hell and she rolled her eyes. My oldest gave them a few weeks, and then I pointed out to her, using materials in the link and related links, that their assertions about homosexuality being unnatural were nonsense, and that homosexuality occurs all across nature, whereas Baptist faith requires that the believer believe in miracles, which are violations of nature -- in other words, homosexuality is in harmony with nature and Christianity flouts nature. So the Bapists are now POed at her too.

Esteban3304's picture
Well, each to their own on

Well, each to their own on how to handle this kind of situation. Here's what I do most of the time. I tell them I could never be a Christian because I am so repulsed by what Moses did in Numbers 31 and the fact that the Christian god rewarded Moses for doing it. Totally reprehensible, given my moral standards. To explain, Numbers 31 chronicles the events right after the Jews' war with the Midianites, a rival culture at the time and very popular with a lot of Jews. Well, in Numbers 31, Moses leads his soldiers in a mass attack on innocent little Midianite children who were prisoners of war, killing every male child no matter what age. Then in Matt. 17, Moses gets to appear unto Jesus, long after Moses was dead. Only the Christian god could have arranged this. So that is just an unacceptable situation in my moral code, a mass murderer of children getting a ringside seat to the Transfiguration of Jesus. By bringing this series of events up, I don't have to really explain much else about myself being an atheist - as the reasons for why I don't believe in any god could create a long discussion, and allow the believer to espouse all the silly reasons he or she accepts the possibility of a deity. I just like to stick on this little topic, how horrible it is, and how could one EVER buy into a religion that has such an offensive episode in it regarding two of its important figures. I'm not saying it's the best way to handle the situation, but I do enjoy watching some supposedly moral do-gooder try to explain why it's ok for Moses to have committed massive infanticide and still get to hang out with Jesus when he was Transfigured - a pretty important point during Jesus's supposed life here on earth. It certainly has the effect of turning the tables regarding who is in charge of the conversation.

Rosemary Lei's picture
A certain friend of mine

A certain friend of mine cannot understand why I don't want to pray anymore, so I asked her, "Do you still write letters to santa claus?" "No," she answered me. "But that is exactly how I view the christian god now. He is just as fictional as santa."

"Prove to me that god doesn't exist. Do you have any proof?" She later asked me. "Prove to me that santa claus doesn't exist." I told her. But she couldn't, because there is no possible way to disprove something.

anyway, it was a good way of ending the conversation . . . and a bit entertaining too. haha. :) haha

Zaphod's picture
I kind of like this response!

I kind of like this response! Not to mean but it gets the point across.

Carroll's picture
if you just want them to stop

if you just want them to stop I really don't think giving reasons really helps, just gives them more to talk about on the subject, so I generally just interrupt and say, "oh, thank you so much for sharing..." and immediately follow up with a major shift in topic asking them what they think about the food, weather, how they know so-and-so, where they grew up, etc... if it's someone that just randomly walks up to me I just say, "oh, you are preaching to the choir here!" and walk away, then they feel like 'their work is done' with me and are not compelled to try to save my soul or some such.

Morgaine Uv Avalon's picture
I was a Christian once, and I

I was a Christian once, and I still don't hate them, I just don't believe the same thing... If they are aware you are an atheist, and proceed to attempt to shove their beliefs down your throat, then you should react violently, because NO one, of ANY religious persuasion, or non-religious persuasion should EVER try to force another person to believe the same way. However, if the offending party is completely oblivious as to your stance, the best approach, at first, is always the polite one. I usually use this approach, "You know, your passion about your belief is admirable, however, I don't exactly have the same view point as you, and this is a subject I would rather not discuss, or even hear about, I would appreciate it if we could change the subject to a less controversial one." This will be the tale of the persons character. If they then respond with force, or indignation, followed by force, this is a person you would be best served to put in your ear buds and drown them out. NEVER EVER give place to an argument. That just makes you look as ignorant as they are. WE are educated, civilized people. Our approach to this subject is with educated, well-rounded, mature mentality. Not with the immature, abusive, explosive emotional state of our religious counter parts. If they continue to behave aggressively, then the best approach is to call the authorities, as this person is obviously more mentally unstable than your usual crazy religious nut. However, if they respect your boundaries, and chose to change the subject, and continue to interact with you, they might be an interesting person to get to know. It also depends on the nature of the situation in which you find yourself. I have lots of friends where we talk, but we have an understanding that religion and politics are simply NOT on the table to discuss, EVER. They respect that, and we get on great. If the person is simply an acquaintance, and you don't want to get into all of that with them, perhaps in the name of peace, the polite head bob and "You are so ignorant, you poor soul" smile is the best approach. Instant aggression, and hatred doesn't have to be the first answer. If we are attempting to educate the world on our stance, then shouldn't we be willing to go at it with a more mature and well-rounded approach than the rest of them?

Chris T.'s picture
That's easy, just tell them

That's easy, just tell them your Muslim.


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