What do you say when someone sneezes?

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Harry33Truman's picture
Instead of saying "bless you,

Instead of saying "bless you," I say "fuck you."

Sky Pilot's picture
The good news is that you

The good news is that you will never sneeze while you are sleeping.

Hans Peter's picture
I usually say, "Salute" or

I usually say, "Salute" or if I'm at work I yell, "Get him outta here!!"

curtisabass's picture
The Japanese feel it is bad

The Japanese feel it is bad form to notice the bodily functions of others. They simply turn their head and feel sorry for the person who called attention to himself.

The_Hyphenator's picture
I say "gesundheit." It just

I say "gesundheit." It just means "good health," which I figure is a fair thing for me to wish somebody, while me saying "bless you" is fairly pointless.

Jeff Ricci's picture
A tes souhaits

A tes souhaits

James Patterson's picture
Usually I say "Cleanup, aisle

Usually I say "Cleanup, aisle 3!"
I just don't see the point in saying bless you or bless you or anything. It's just a damn sneeze.

Eric Grunewald's picture
I usually say Bless you, both

I usually say Bless you, both out of habit and to be compassionate to the audience, who are usually believers in some religious system. But I frequently just ask "Kleenex?" and offer the box, which I usually have somewhere nearby. Little is worse than being in public and sneezing, and find you've just squirted a pint of gooey mucus down your face and don't have a hankie handy anywhere. Really bad when driving, too.

Waterbear's picture
I'm some Spanish speaking

I'm some Spanish speaking countries, on the first sneeze, you'd say "salud" (health), second one you'd say "dinero" (money), third "amor" (love)

Ariel M. Robles Ortiz's picture
In the Dominican Republic,

In the Dominican Republic, despite being a vastly religious country, we just say "Salud" which translates to "health." For Hispanic culture, is more of wishing the person good health, instead of God's blessings.

Just say bless you if you're around a religious environment. While it is true that no one is bound by any law to say anything, it is still common etiquette for western society. Anyone has the option to choose to say something or not. That is the beauty of living in a free democracy. However, if you choose not to say anything, you must understand the cultural punitive actions that other people might take upon you. In most cases, people will just perceive you as disrespectful. As a result, secondary actions might affect your life because of it. At the end of the day, I wouldn't like to work with a "disrespectful person" neither. So, just save you the trouble.

MCDennis's picture
usually nothing... but i

usually nothing... but i sometimes say to my grandchildren to sneeze into their sleeves or elbow... you know, to prevent the germs from spreading

Tin-Man's picture
Lately my wife and I have

Lately my wife and I have started saying, "Hale, Satan!" to each other when we sneeze. (Forgot why, exactly.) Funny as hell, though. (Pardon the pun.) But if we happen to be out in public and say it, some of the looks from the folks who might be within earshot can be priceless. LOL

Sky Pilot's picture
Tin-man,

Tin-man,

Do you know why you can't sneeze while you're sleeping? Satan lives in your nostrils when you are sleeping so if you were to sneeze while sleeping you would rudely expel him. That's why he must be gently washed out every morning.
http://islamcomicbook.com/10.htm
http://islamcomicbook.com/11.htm

Tin-Man's picture
@Dio Re: Nose Devil

@Dio Re: Nose Devil

Well now... That would certainly explain the fire and brimstone I smell every morning.

What really got my attention, though, is the ban on playing chess. WTF?

algebe's picture
@Diotrephes:

@Diotrephes:

Great site! There's some weird shit in there. Apparently I have seven intestines while Muslims only have one.

Sky Pilot's picture
Algebe,

Algebe,

That's a rare instance where the passage is probably meant as a metaphor. The intent was probably to show that a muslim isn't a glutton like the typical non-muslim was depicted as being. It's a rephrasing of the biblical verses about being a glutton.

Remember, in Deuteronomy 19:19-21 (NKJV) the penalty for being a glutton was death by stoning =

"19 then his father and his mother shall take hold of him and bring him out to the elders of his city, to the gate of his city. 20 And they shall say to the elders of his city, ‘This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious; he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton and a drunkard.’ 21 Then all the men of his city shall stone him to death with stones; so you shall put away the evil from among you, and all Israel shall hear and fear."

And Yeshua was accused of being a drunkard and glutton =

Matthew 11:18-19 (NKJV) = "18 For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, ‘He has a demon.’ 19 The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Look, a glutton and a winebibber, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’ But wisdom is justified by her children.”"

There are a lot of biblical stories that illustrate good manners at meals.

algebe's picture
@Diotrephes:

@Diotrephes:

According to http://islamcomicbook.com/11.htm, chess was forbidden by Mohammed (probably because he was a lousy player!). But now Saudi Arabia has hit the news for hosting an international chess tournament and refusing to issue visas for Israeli players.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-42484987

Sky Pilot's picture
Algebe,

Algebe,

They are a bunch of heretics!

LostLocke's picture
If it's people I know I

If it's people I know I sometimes dive to the floor and yell "Incoming!"

Tin-Man's picture
@Lost Re: Incoming

@Lost Re: Incoming

Aw, maaaaan! That's a great one. Wish I had thought of that while in Iraq. That would have been hilarious! lol

mickron88's picture
simply say "next time, cover

simply say "next time, cover your f*****g mouth!!"

Cronus's picture
My favorite.

My favorite.

( accompany with a look of disgust).

"uh... You've got a snotwad on your chin."

It almost always promotes vigorous wiping and the frantic "did I get it?".

Keep assuring them it' s still there for as long as possible.

If somebody is playing germ warfare on a hobby level with you, you' re entitled to get as much amusement out of the situation as is possible.

Jess Firlotte's picture
'Gesundheit' cause it means

'Gesundheit' cause it means 'good health'. Then there's actually a response that means 'health is better than sickness'.

Though, I found that out from the back of a 1940s comic book when I was like 9 so (as always) take it with a grain of salt lol

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