I was neutral. Then I wondered perhaps there is more to life than mere survival, so I became a Christian and gave my life to Christ. In some kind of existential wrestling match between my brain and my imaginary friend (I'm crazy), I somehow, perhaps by my imagination or through an indirect telepathic message from God, figured my purpose in life is to become a philosopher. So I dedicated my life to thought.
... And as I drive deeper and deeper into the bowels of this intellectual pursuit, I'm starting become a hard-hearted agnostic. I still see myself as a Christian because, in some kind of collateral speechcraft to guarantee myself a spot in a possible celestial paradise, I declared with my mouth that I accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior and that I believe He rose from the dead.
The reason I was and still am a Christian is because of the religion's promise of hope. I mean, what the heck does atheism have? Nihilistic Nazism evidenced in Hitler's gifting of Mussolini the works of Friedrich Nietzsche. But to maintain my integrity as a philosopher, I have to seek the truth. If God is there, I will find Him. If not, I'll have to adopt a more truthful worldview.
I guess my question is... A lot.
This is honestly a cry for help. I want to be convinced that a loving God is here for us but Goddammit it's so difficult to intellectually believe in Him.
What arguments have competent apologists posed to atheists that are actually worthy of being threatening? There has to be something...
Please, tell me how I can convince you that what I am doubting to be the truth is actually the truth. Namely, the validity of the Christian faith as a coherent worldview.
The more I learn, the tougher further learning becomes. It's frustrating.
So like... Maybe the resurrection of Christ and whether or not it happened? Or the other miracles in the Bible? Those are the only empirical evidence we have.
P.S. = This might seem funny to some of you but it's sincere. I WANT the gospel of Christ to prevail. I really want to. I want to be convinced that it is truthful.
Choosing to subscribe to this topic will automatically register you for email notifications for comments and updates on this thread.
Email notifications will be sent out daily by default unless specified otherwise on your account which you can edit by going to your userpage here and clicking on the subscriptions tab.