Important Corona Virus Transmission Issue Addressed

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Grinseed's picture
Important Corona Virus Transmission Issue Addressed

Dr Norman Swan is a long time respected and popular science journalist with the Australian Broadcasting Commission. I have listened to his informative programs for over thirty years. Tegan Taylor is a health and science journalist in the ABC Science Unit and during her current show, Coronacast, she quizzed Norman about a compelling transmission concern involving Covid 19.

Tegan Taylor: A final question from an audience member for you today, this is David with a hard-hitting question; if the virus can turn up in faeces, does that mean that farts could be a transmission route?

Norman Swan: You get really intelligent, pointed questions on Coronacast and this is no doubt one of them. Well, luckily we wear a mask which covers our farts all the time, so I think that even if it were to…I think that what we should do in terms of social distancing and being safe is that a policy on the part of the entire Australian population should be that you don't fart close to other people, and that you don't fart with your bottom bare.

Tegan Taylor: This is excellent advice from Dr Swan. Thank you so much for clearing that up.

Norman Swan: Yep, science-based, this is hard-core evidence here we're talking about.

Tegan Taylor: No bare bottoms.

Norman Swan: No bare-bottom farting.

Mmmm...I think I'm going to have to get some cork stoppers to go with my hand sanitiser and masks just to be sure.

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Whitefire13's picture
I’ve been using it as a

I’ve been using it as a measure to ensure other people respect the “social distancing”.

Grinseed's picture
@ pugonasofa,

@ pugonasofa,

My experience has shown that farting certainly has been known to clear rooms I've entered in the past, but I suspect in these uncertain days it is now a matter of etiquette to rely on the less effective biological social distancing method of not bathing, showering or using any deodorants at all. Has worked for me for donkeys' ages.

Whitefire13's picture
Lol - me too...I call it

Lol - me too...I call it being “my natural self”

Tin-Man's picture
Well, fuck.... Now farting in

Well, fuck.... Now farting in public can get you arrested as a terrorist.... *shaking head in dismay*....

Sheldon's picture
Ok I have a question, how do

Ok I have a question, how do you keep a fart 2m away from yourself and everyone else? I mean once it is out, there is no way to track it.

Grinseed's picture
Maybe. Can they extract DNA

Maybe. Can they extract DNA from a fart?

Whitefire13's picture
Depends on how wet it is. Is

Depends on how wet it is. Is it a shart?

David Killens's picture
Proof that not all

Proof that not all televangelists are ignoring this epidemic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZVIMV2rvCwc

"I smell heaven's bakery cooking up something good "

Cognostic's picture
@AWWWW FUCK! I gotta start

@AWWWW FUCK! I gotta start wearing pants again? They are so binding and I hate having to take them on and off every time I want to boink something.

Cognostic's picture
@Sheldon: INTRODUCING THE

@Sheldon: INTRODUCING THE FART TRACKER 2000.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhP5uF1ks-A

That takes care of the inside.... and now for something completely different!

Thermal imaging farts. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t2PoPh2B9qo

David Killens's picture
Video from the Banana Factory

Video from the Banana Factory .... why no surprise?

boomer47's picture
@Grinseed.

@Grinseed.

"Mmmm...I think I'm going to have to get some cork stoppers to go with my hand sanitiser and masks just to be sure."

Oh absolutely. When you feel a fart coming on, lower your trews at point your bum at some one you don't like. Such as the mother of that recalcitrant child at the supermarket

Better still, keep your trews on and simply hold a naked flame near your bum as you fart. This will produce a pretty blue flame and no worse than a second degree burn. Do NOT try this you have the hiccups; your bum may ingest the flame.

David Killens's picture
Just stick a kazoo up your

Just stick a kazoo up your ass. Or better yet, the mouthpiece from a trumpet.

Grinseed's picture
@DK, great idea BUT, I still

@DK, great idea BUT, I still havent recovered the slide trombone that I tragically "encountered" years ago in a particularly nasty traffic accident involving a truck from the local music instrument factory. I still suffer the most embarrassingly long farts in E flat.

Grinseed's picture
@ Cranky

@ Cranky

"Do NOT try this [when] you have the hiccups; your bum may ingest the flame."

Knowledge through personal experience?

boomer47's picture
"owledge through personal

"owledge through personal experience?"

Umm, no.

Only time I saw a rectum 'swallow 'something was at the vet. The vet was taking my dog's temp see, and turned away for a second . He had to recover it manually. Dog effected a rather pained expression.

I DID once see a bloke set fire to a thunderous fart. A long jet of blue flame and a plaintive cry of 'Oh FUUUUUUCKKKK!!!"

Whitefire13's picture
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v
Old man shouts at clouds's picture
I think I will start wearing

I think I will start wearing my kilt again. Fart dispersal is very easy with a quick swirl. Also gives the ladies a frisson of excitement

boomer47's picture
@Old Man '

@Old Man '

A kilt? Really? Photos please.

Is it just dress up, or do you belong to a Scottish tribe?

My family is Irish, so no tartan, just plain emerald green (Southern Irish) . Our Coat of arms features a black man in chains. Doesn't matter, I have no right to our coat of arms. Neither my father nor his father were first sons, although I am .

David Killens's picture
Why do the Scots wear kilts?

Why do the Scots wear kilts?

The sound of a zipper stampedes the sheep.

boomer47's picture
@David

@David

If they have music in hell it will be from bagpipes. To which the Scot replies to the Irishman ; "Yair, IRISH bagpipes

I was going to say "a few years ago" but then realised this was in 2000 ----------- Went backpacking around Ireland and Scotland., Loved both countries. Although it pains me to admit, I found Scotland **more beautiful than Ireland -----------Anyway, whilst travelling around Scotland, I never once saw a Scot wearing a kilt.

Trivia: Wearing a kilt was popularised in modern time by the German queen Victoria and her German hubby prince Albert, when they decided they loved all things Scottish. Strictly speaking, wearing a kilt was still legally banned in the UK at the time.I guess nobody was going to issue Vicky a fine------

***********************************V*************************************

**at a b&b at which I stayed on Skye, the Landlady lived up to the Scottish reputation for being tight--as I went in for breakfast she** enquired, "----and how would you like your EGG? " (singular)

I think I can give some details because I think she'd be dead by now and was running a business open to the public. Her name was Mrs McLeod of the clan McLeod . Her named house was on Stormy Hill Road, Portree, Isle Of Skye. Mrs Mac had a burr which could probably injure a person if used in anger. Actually, very nice digs, with a good room. Mrs Mac also recommended a good place for dinner.

Old man shouts at clouds's picture
@ Cranky

@ Cranky

I lived in Skye. Spoke gaelic until I was four/five and we moved to the mainland. I likely knew your landlady, who would like my Auntie and Uncle considered all things not of Skye to be "English".
You were not offered the "guga" then which is salted gannet? Ah you missed a gourmet delight.

My family are directly descended from those who first became christianized by Calum in the 5th century CE and are known as "sons of Columba" i.e Malcolm or McCallum or MacCallum. Malcolms of course are famous for the kingship of the Scots...also starring in Shakespeare's play as inaccurate as it is.

Yes I wear a kilt and have a couple. Neither in my family tartan, modern kilts can be grey, black, tweed and are worn extensively as everyday dress (forgive the pun) in Scotland. I used to have full highland dress and also Regimental Tartan, but those are long past as is my 28 inch waist LOL.....

boomer47's picture
@old man

@old man

". I likely knew your landlady, who would like my Auntie and Uncle considered all things not of Skye to be "English"."

You lived on Skye? Gee, not sure I'd want to live there.--- My family lived in a country town for two years. Population about 5000 . At 8 to 10 I thought the place was the dark side the moon.

I saw a goodly bit of Scotland ,but not nearly as much as I wanted. Usually stayed at Youth Hostels. I was constantly blown away by the beauty of the place. I really liked the 2 mile walk to the Youth Hostel near Glencoe. I ended my backpacking journey at Drumadrochit on Loch Ness.That land lady was young and put me in mind of Nigella Lawson --

Left Drumadrochit at 8.00 next morning to by bus for Inverness. Was home in Cambridge at 6 pm.

PS Mrs McCleod's House on Stormy Hill near bottom of the hill and was called 'The Failings', I think.

Thought for the day " Australians think 100 years is a long time. Brits think 100 mils is a long way " (anon)

Old man shouts at clouds's picture
@ Cranky

@ Cranky

From what I remember, including later holidays on my Aunt Nessie's croft , Skye was a very safe place for kids and families. The community was close and yes, everyone knew the intimate details of everyone's business. As children of course we all took risks that would be considered outrageous nowadays. Scrambling and roping down the cliffs in search of Gulls eggs, going off all day in a pack with our 'snap' (lunch) and not returning until dusk was fully lit by the glow of the lamps.

My Aunt Nessie (aged 92 and Uncle Willie aged 89) left their croft on Skye when the bridge to the mainland opened. They took on a croft in Uist. Couldn't stand the the thought of the Skye being invaded by "the English" not racist as anyone from the mainland was considered "English" to the older generation. Of course they were distrusted accordingly.

Right now I find it amusing that my grasp of the gaelic was recalled very quickly....to a 5 year old level, then it became a daily grind of learning! What I did not realise, was how thick my Skye accent returned....not as incomprehensible as Lewis (there is a lady who speaks to me and it might as well be in Martian)

Here's something I hope you appreciate! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btg-aEPNiRg

Whitefire13's picture
Oh fuck, oh fuck... oh fuck!!

Oh fuck, oh fuck... oh fuck!!!

OMS, sorta scanned - didn’t really read it (sorry) BUT LMFAO.

...” and Uncle Willie ”

Old man shouts at clouds's picture
@ Whitefire.

@ Whitefire.

Yep....real name Uilleam...William in English.

I know you and Cog share toilet humor...and the toilet but, really: *flounces off making kilt swirl seductively*

David Killens's picture
Caution: Adult content that

Caution: Adult content that may offend. No horses were harmed in the making of this video.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZAFo4jXhW0

Tin-Man's picture
@David K. Re: Vid link

@David K. Re: Vid link

Damn you... I hate that I actually laughed at that... *grumble*...

boomer47's picture
@Old man

@Old man

What wonderful memories to have. My memories of Skye are only over a few days.

I was born here in Adelaide . My mother was Anglo-Celt Canadian not Quebecois so I didn't learn French from her. I apparently had a charming Canadian accent until I started school.

I DO have some great a memories of my time based in Malaysia and Singapore (1969-70)

Spent a lot of time in a Malay kampong, learned to speak Malay and made a lot of great friends , all Muslim . I think my first hand experience among people who happened to be Muslim is one reason I neither fear nor distrust Muslims . The other I was lucky enough to be able to study aspects of Islamic culture at university. There is no doubt in my mind, experience and knowledge kill fear and bigotry.

Trivia: I was present the night of the opening of the New Firth Of Forth bridge, in 1985. A great view from the hotel at which we were staying . Much jocularity was had by all.

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